Harmony in Conflict

Lunar New Year 2012 greetings

2012-01-22T20:14:00.001+08:00

Preliminary Announcement from Malaysian Aikido Association

2011-11-22T01:48:00.003+08:00

Preliminary Announcement: Hombu Shihan Seminar 2012

Hombu Shihan Seminar 2012
Shoji SEKI Shihan

Dates:
23rd March to 25th March 2012

Venue:
SPORTS ARENA @ SENTOSA
JALAN SERI SENTOSA 2A
TAMAN SRI SENTOSA
58000 KUALA LUMPUR

Programme:
To be announced

Seminar Fees:
To be announced

All Aikikai Aikido practitioners are welcome.

A night to remember

2011-10-05T17:03:00.000+08:00

Life is just full of surprises. One surprise was that work has been quite loaded causing me to miss out on my evening aikido training sessions for the past 2 weeks. I didn't like it one bit considering that we only have 2 training sessions a week. Well it is a little bit unfair to say that it is a surprise judging from the line of work that I am in..*snort snort*.

But what happened last night was a surprise and simply amazing. Something that we hadn't done in a while now. After dinner ma, moo and I were just lounging in the living room and talking about our upcoming trip to Melbourne for moo's graduation ceremony. There were talks of where to bring pa to eat, where to eat and when to eat. In other words we were planning our NomFest. I only see my pa once a year so I am always very excited to see him, although it does come with other famously celebrated issues (which don't really matter anymore).

Ma had a thing or two to say about the trip but somehow when the conversation starting revolving around pa I thought up the idea of sending him to this seminar and see what would become of him. Relying on our memories of pa's favourite reactions and terms of endearment, three of us cracked up talking about how he would react in various scenarios. One thing led to another and soon enough we, or rather I, ended up rolling around on the laughing like a hyena. Ma and moo had a blast as well laughing at the jokes..and at me laughing. We were all worn out after but that was a wonderful and warm way to end the night. I love looking at ma's face, wrinkles and all, beaming from the amusement.

It might be just another crazy BS joking day but these are one of the family times I cherish the most.

I love you my family. Love you.

Drawing circles

2011-09-28T12:28:00.000+08:00

After a rather long break for the Eid holidays it was training as usual at the dojo. Last night was my first session with session since the break. Things are different now and I have mixed feelings about it. What happened last year is still vivid in my mind and everytime I look at sensei moving on the mat I can't help but feel a sense of loss and sadness. But I must not disgress. What I want to write about in this post is about the training. I was truly glad to be back in sensei's class after the break. We, the few seniors now have sensei all to ourselves as the dojo agreed to split the classes into beginners and seniors. To top is off, there were only the 2 of us for this class. I can see a big workout coming..yaaaaay.

One of the differences I noticed in the senior's class is that we don't have our normal exercise that we used to do for the general class: tai sabaki, ukemi, shikko etc. I can only assume that where we are now we should be reasonably proficient with these movements therefore practice of them is dispensed with and we are expected to refine them in our own time.

Sensei started with the ikkyo movement, stopping after entry has been made. What he wanted was to draw the circle for ikkyo in a different way from how we would usually do it, which forwards. The circle is drawn to the side to to speak is achieves the same goal as the other circle, which is kuzushi. Sensei was talking about drawing circles, how you draw them and where you draw them. I was training with a man who is taller and much stronger than I am. Having been training from another (now defuncted) dojo, he still retains the trappings of his past training despite sensei's instruction there for over a 1 year before the dojo closed. I am familiar with his movements and tried my best to adjust to his movements which were heavily dependant on the muscular power of his arms. At times I feel a very strong re-coil from his entry and my re-action would manifest itself through the medium of certain sounds (insert laughter here). Maybe I am getting too soft..

Then we moved on to executing the technique. Apart from drawing circles I was also told to draw my circles firmly and in the right place. I think sometimes I tend to be too "nice" during training and it compromises the timing and effectiveness of my techniques. Something that sensei wants done away with.

The difficulty I find during the training is the timing of it all. You need to make contact at the right time and space, otherwise you would end up with a heavy shomen, feeling a strain on you lower back taking the shomen or stretched out of your spacee etc. What I see is that it boils down to not clashing with your partner. Ah Mr Awase. I really don't see you that often! And of course I needed to get over the mental hurdle that I am dealing with someone that is taller and stronger than I. But then again it would be pretty boring if all things were equal. It was tiring but I had lots of fun.

I have always loved circles.

To all Muslim friends and family

2011-08-30T08:09:00.000+08:00

Office Trip 2011

2011-07-19T12:42:00.002+08:00

I am very fortunate to be part of yet another annual office trip this year, which means that the firm is doing well. After much debating on the destination this year, it was settled: Gold Coast, Australia! There is not going to be any sun tanning at the beaches though since we are making the trip during winter.

The flight was a good flight. I usually sleep during the flight (or rather, when it is time to..). I managed to watch 2 1/2 movies and do abit of a stretch-about to keep my limbs from seizing up. The weather on the first night was good; cool with slgith breeze. From what the tour leader told us, we would be having dinner at an Asian restaurant. We were under the assumption that she had made reservations at the restaurant as it was quite late unti the night when we arrived at the hotel and we were not entirely sure whether eateries will still be open at that time. Plus she told us that she did some surveying on the day before. We enjoyed the weather and sights until we arrived at the restaurant; it was closed! so we walked around some more until we came to a kebab shop. I felt like having something else then so a colleague and I had some pizza. that was the first night.

The second and third day was taken up by making trips to the Universal Studios' Sea World and Movie World. Below are some of the pictures taken at Sea World.

The fish detectives. No prize guessing who the star of the show is.

My favourite show. I am always amazed to see the dolphins physical prowess and intelligence.

Taking this picture made me feel like diving.

The penguins were most amusing. Marching back and forth.

The lone and contemplating penguin. Looks suicidal almost.

Pcitures taken at Movie World:

One of the cartoon characters I managed to capture on film. I missed out on alot of the characters because of the time we spent in the queue to watch the stunt show.

The stunt show is a must see if you are going to Movie World. The stuntmen were awesome!

Grand finale.

The fourth day was supposedly an exciting hot air balloon ride trip. I could barely wake up at 4:00am to get ready for pick up at 4:20pm. there were 8 of us that signed up so we were quite excited although groggy. It was very chilly at that time of the morning and the heater was turned on in the van. that with am empty stomach and lack of sleep..not good. The driver told us that the balloon would be launch in one of several sites and the pilot is driving around to see which site would prove to be most conducive for take off. Alas, 45 minutes later at the pit stop we were given the bad news: windspeed of 30-40 knots per hour. During to the unsafe weather conditions, we went back to the hotel to have breakfast at 6:30am. With the trip cancelled, the group decided to join the rest for a shopping trip at a factory outlet shopping mall. And that was the last day.

There were some very good moments during the trip and my friend and I finally found out who those hot sexy ladies wearing little golden shorts are: they are the meter girls! Took a picture with one of them for posterity. Hehehe.

Only thing is, it would have been better if I got managed to train one session at a dojo!

Upgrade

2011-06-16T12:16:00.001+08:00

Once again I find myself in Jakarta since the company trip last year. This is around it is for aikido seminar. I had the pleasure of being taken cared of by my Indonesian hosts, who too the time and effort to pick me up from the airport at midnight.

Upon arrival at hotel, I was told that my room had been cancelled! I did not know how my room was cancelled as the booking was made through my Indonesian hosts. So I picked up my book and started my reading whilst the gentlemen tried to resolved the issue with the receptionist. Whilst the resolution was ongoing, I was informed that sometimes the hotels here employ certain tactics to compel the guests to upgrade their rooms thereby generating a little more income for the hotel in the process. Just like my case, single lady, tired and standing at the lobby in the middle of the night.

Suffice to say that with some fanfare the issue was resolved. I ended up getting a suite with no extra costs. For that I am abundantly grateful to my hosts.

I took some pictures of the suite and I must say, it is not too bad at all.

The living area

At the living area leading into the bedroom

Ahh the bedroom. Nice bed but I did not sleep well on the first night.

48 hours

2011-05-30T19:01:00.000+08:00

No man is an island

No man is an island entire of itself; every man
is a piece of the continent, a part of the main;
if a clod be washed away by the sea, Europe
is the less, as well as if a promontory were, as
well as a manor of thy friends or of thine
own were; any man's death diminishes me,
because I am involved in mankind.
And therefore never send to know for whom
the bell tolls; it tolls for thee.

-John Donne-

Went for short trip to my second home over the weekend which I thought would only involve 2 things. Catching up with friends and aikido. It turned out to be much more than that.

I managed to do both but because I only had 48 hours time management was abit of a problem. So on short trips like this I only tell a few of my friends. But then again which is worse, telling your friend but able to meet up or not telling at all and they found out later? It all depends on your discretion and conscience really. Maybe at the very least you should call?

First thing after arriving I went for dinner and a stand up comedy performance by the local up and coming comedian by the name of Kuah Jen Han. He first appeared as Rambo Tan and then by himself in his first solo act. He takes the CinaPek approach and speaking Chinglish. It was a night of laughter as I find myself relating to things Asian, Chinese and Malaysian. It was drinks after and I met a new acquaintance and a good friend whom I met from diving. The acquaintance was occupied with a personal matter. Good friend came over a little later and that is where the fun begins! First of all he commented on my slack in consuming standards but hey, I never did have a chance to practice back home. As the night went on it gets more and more interesting. We spoke about boundaries and innuendos. I don't think I will dwell into my mode of communication but suffice to say that the words "too straight, naive and blur" ruled the night.

I felt bad for making the same mistake but am glad that the conversation happened. Sometimes it is very important who you interact or choose to surround yourself with. I realized that sad as it may sound, you can only interact with a person only in a confined situation, or specific situation. And yes, I am very glad for that night. Alas, after the analysis and diagnosis it was time to go before I could speak more to my good friend about his happenings in life. Next trip I shall make a better effort. I will call on you when I next come over buddy!

The next day I managed to have a short chat with my SM and caught up with her. Soon it was time for me to get ready to meet up with my aikido friends and off I went. I met another friend who was the taxi driver that SM introduced to bring me around. Very chirpy and friendly Punjabi who spoke fluent Cantonese.

The afternoon spent with some very good friends in my aikido life followed by an instructive training lesson. I also got a very nice gift: a kuro obi with my grandfather's name on it. I will leave the aikido part for another post.

For the evening I was supposed to cook dinner and make chocolate fondant for SM but..ahem...that did not happen. I feel very bad about it but then again I can't really do all that much in 48 hours. I should not have been overly ambitious and promised SM. So once more I did not live up to my promise. I shall make it up to her in a few months' time. This time it will be a much longer trip and I will feed her silly! Hehehehe.

Catching up with E over dinner was wonderful. I apparently amused her husband with some of my recent happenings. To his joy he found out that SM is also a Manchester United FC fan and the European Champions finals between Manchester United and Barcelona FC was due to be aired in a few hours' time. I watched it with SM and boy Barca outclassed Man U. Man U just could not keep up with Barca and I felt a lack of spirit among the Man U players as a team. Oh well I only watch soccer once every 4 years and occasionally with SM so I should just congratulate Barca for a winning the championship.

Although the 48 hours were exhausting it ironically injected me with some positive energy. It was because I was around some good people with some really good energy. People who love and people who care. People who take relationships seriously.

Thank you friends for being part of my life.

A return to my baking days?

2011-05-21T23:58:00.002+08:00

I started baking at the age of 15 and stopped after I went to university. From baking I worked on my cooking skills to keep myself properly fed. I don't really like eating out and still don't.

Chocolate pudding/chocolate fondant is one of my favourite desserts. Actually most deserts with chocolate tickles my fancy. Of course that would mean eating out. One day I said to myself, "why do you have to eat out when you can make it yourself?". So I decided that I will start baking again.

What you see in the picture was my first attempt at making chocolate fondant after a long break. The taste was good but the batter ended up being too thick although I followed the recipe. What was missing was the vanilla ice cream.

My next project is apple pie. I have made the dough which is now chilling in the refrigerator. Will post up pictures of the pie, if it turns out ok. Have a great weekend!

The 7 dollar Dutch butter

2011-05-15T11:30:00.001+08:00

The last time I went to Indonesia I was requested to look for a certain Dutch butter which supposedly is top quality and wonderful for baking. I bought a couple according to the picture she showed me but it ended up not being the one that she wanted because the cans I bought were not meant for baking. Oh well, can bake with it but I can still consume it.

Here it is.

The front view.

The content.

I happened to have some chocolate raisin bread in the house so I save myself from having to "kahwin" the bread with another spread. That and a glass of nice cold milk. Nice.

The butter has a strong fragrant and is rich in taste. But somehow it is also telling my heart something too. Hahaha. An enjoyable breakfast :)

Good day everyone!

Seminar by Horii shihan May 2011

2011-05-14T23:40:00.002+08:00

I had the opportunity of attending a seminar by Horii shihan again after the first time 2 years ago in Malaysia. I first met sensei in Tanabe in 2008. I was pointed out to sensei by Z sensei who told me to take the opportunity to train with him. Being very much a baby practitioner then I was very shy but when I eventually mustered up the courage to move myself across the mat to be near him, he got "booked" by a regular. Nevertheless, my chance came a year later when Horii sensei took one session at MAA's 15th Anniversary seminar. I wanted to learn more and my chance came when I found out that Horii sensei makes his rounds in Malaysia and Singapore at certain times of every year.

Although the seminar was only for a day, it was worth the trip. Made some new friends along the way too!

Looking forward to my next seminar in Jakarta!

Take it easy

2011-04-29T00:14:00.000+08:00

There are ups and downs in life and right now it is down down down. Maybe I am just being pessimistic because things are not going my way. Being selfish as usual instead of seeing things as they are. Many a times you just have no control over anything because of the timing, persons involved, karma..etc etc etc.

But hey there is light at the end of the tunnel because this weekend I will be travelling somewhere to attend one of my favourite events! I haven't been training as often as I should but I am determined to have a jolly good time!

In the meantime I will learn from this baby and relax...

Have a good weekend all!

Something interesting today

2011-04-25T23:46:00.004+08:00

It has been a rather eventful week before and it looks as if this week will be more "eventful". Training goes on as usual. C took the class tonight and just before class started he was sharing with me something he learnt about executing a yokomenuchi attack. He asked me to execute a yokomenuchi. As I move forward with my tegatana C proceeded to raise his arm straight at me with a fist. I was taken aback and could not finish my attack as I was contrained to block the punch. Hmmmm. So C explained to me why there would be no point in him receive my yokomenuchi. It is the same for katatedori and morotedori. I was in his direct line of attack. That was a good reminder. We explored on this a little bit more after class and N pitched in and we discussed about whether it would make a difference if we it was static compared to irimi-tenkan. It was a good discussion and I realized that we seemed to be doing it abit more after we became yudansha. Truly, this is where we begin to learn about aikido.

Taking C's class is always interesting. He makes the effort to put some life into training (otherwise it is usually very serious and...well serious). I am not saying that he plays around during training but its a different perspective. We paired up for our ukemi and kaiten ukemi practice (which is usually done solo) and that gives us a feel of taking ukemi with a partner. Doing ukemi on your own is good but I feel that at some stage you will need to "feel" the taking of ukemi.

We first trained generally with our kyu partners on shomenuchi dai nikkyo. J was a little stiff which makes him more prone to kuzushi than others. I am probably not articulating this properly but i hope you get what I mean. As for S, he was abit tense which made it difficult for him to taken ukemi in urawaza. He seemed to be in great fear of the arm lock as it would end up being very very stiff. I would ask him to relax him arm and let fall as if it was asleep. I never imagined me telling others to relax because I used to get that alot from most senseis. Hahaha.

We did some techniques with dual attacks. Firstly katatedori with shomenuchi and secondly katadori with shomenuchi. Moving from dealing with just one attack to two made me a little unsure and haphazard. It is new to me so I have to make sure we practice practice and practice. As I practice I realized that I can now better relate to blending and kuzushi. The need to recover your balance is indeed very important (it is an interactive endeavour after all). Sometimes I wonder at what point is it that you submit to the technique? Do you keep coming back up until there is absolutely no way to or do you discern for yourself whether it is practical for you to do so?

Maybe we will discuss that at our next training session.

It was a good tiring session and I am off to bed once I get some nom nom to satisfy my wailing stomach. Good night!

Please don't fall!

2011-04-20T23:17:00.001+08:00

Sensei is back in action! With his knee heavily wrapped and guarded he went on the mat to conduct the class. I was abit worried at first but after seeing his first few moves I realized that I was overly concerned and he knew his physical level more than I do!

The kyu students practiced on shomenuchi kotegaeshi while N, C and I worked on some other techniques. We started with ushiro kubishime dai sankyo. One of the things we were asked to take note is to be aware of the space that we occupy during training. Although we are blessed with rather generous mat space (not due to the size of the dojo but the number of students hehehe) that does not mean that we can move wherever we want. It is part of dojo etiquette to be considerate of our fellows' space so that we can train safely. Into the second set of the technique I felt that something was wrong. It did not have that many movements... Ah. I did not pay attention to maai when I came out of the grip hence I could not continue with hanmi tenkan when applying sankyo. Check.

Next technique was hanmi handachi ushiro ryokatadori dai yonkyo. I felt very strange in my movements considering the fact that the uke is now so much taller than me. I had a lot of trouble executing kuzushi on the uke and many a times find myself stuck in a position, feeling very vulnerable. Sensei had us continue our training in tate and explained the mechanics to us and pointing out the differences when doing the same technique in hanmi handachi. All I can say is I suck in execution of of tachiwaza too!

Whilst waiting for my turn to train with my group (we were training in 3's) I noticed one student in the kyu group looking at our training and mimicking our movements. He is a newcomer and appeared to be quite an enthusiastic student considering the fact that he lives in Tutong (40 minutes from dojo) and chose not to join another dojo situated in Tutong. I checked on him a few more times and noticed that he pays more attention to our training than his own. This is another topic of discussion in training which I may go into later. After all this is the first time I see him doing this so I will just observe a few more times before I make any comments.

Sensei shouted "Yame!" and we all lined up. Instead of ending the class he called the kyu students to come forward for a mock examination. You can see nervousness manifesting visibly in their performance which would have been otherwise quite relaxed. Many things were forgotten and movements became more abrupt and mechanical. After the mock test sensei decided that he will also have a go with the yudansha. When C was asked to call his uke, I heard my name and my first reaction was "uh-oh...will I be able to stand up?" Moving forward in shikko had never felt so difficult and when the first technique called is shomenuchi iriminage, I can only hope that my legs will move the way I want them to. Sensei decided to see iriminage executed with different attacks. Ah. I am done for. Somehow I managed to blend in with C and didn't collaspe halfway like a ton of bricks. I was tested as well. It was the exam jitters for all of us!

Sensei gave his comments on our performance in the mock exams and also reiterated the etiquette aspect in the dojo. Before class ended I requested to make a couple of announcements. One of which is concerning sensei's resignation as a member of the technical committee. In my capacity as the Secretary General and on behalf of the federation expressed regret over the resignation followed by a formal speech.

On a personal note I am very sad that sensei has resigned. I took note of his reasons and I think that I would never be able to relate to his situation unless I am in it myself. We all know that his post is not easy. Even for myself I discover new challenges at every turn of my job in the committee. Sensei was one of the pioneer members in Brunei aikido even before the federation was formed. He worked very hard and dedicated much of his time in aikido. He will be sorely missed and I hope that he will continue his post as an instructor as he is currently the only active instructor and the highest ranking aikido practitioner in the country.

Well, the training goes on!

A place for my dogi

2011-03-30T13:26:00.000+08:00

My little aikido section. Hehehe.

A white shelf from IKEA which I installed myself.

Adding to my collection

2011-03-26T20:41:00.001+08:00

I try not to browse at certain sections of a supermarket, knowing full well my weakness for certain things. Then again, I was in need of retail therapy, so...I bought another lunch jar!

My thoughts on Japan

2011-03-18T22:18:00.001+08:00

One of my bento lunches,

wrapped in a furoshiki,

I bought from a good friend just when I was on holiday with my mom.

We enjoyed Japan's beauty, efficiency and advancement. A week later a 9.0 earthquake came and caused a tsunami which changed many things.

My heart aches for those who lost their love ones. I sympathize those who lost their dwellings and belongings. I applaude those who are part of the rescue and rebuilding efforts. I salute those who valiantly stayed behind to work on the reactor crisis.

But Japan is a nation of resilience. As a country situated in the Pacific Ring of Fire, she accepts her precarious geographical location and constantly builds on how to deal with natural calamities as they arise. Admittedly, this time disaster has hit her on a grand scale, but I believe that she will rebuild herself in good time and be up and working just like how she was and maybe even better.

My prayers are with the people of Japan at this difficult time.

Gambatte Nihon!

2011-03-16T07:17:00.000+08:00

On this day, are the anniversaries of 2 very important men.

One I can only honour in memory and the other, in the heart, for now.

I miss you both badly.

Beautiful Japan

2011-03-15T21:39:00.001+08:00

Tis the season!

Aren't they pretty?

Spot the birdie!

Triple visual pleasure

Scenic

The serenity of the crane lured me

One perspective of the garden

Leaning tree? Hehe

I spy with my eye..sakura blossoms

Red Ume

Simple and white!

2011-02-16T18:47:00.000+08:00

My order from Amazon has arrived! Actually it arrived 2 weeks ago but I have it now! I was looking for a jacket to bring for my Tokyo trip and did not have much luck finding what I want. A simple but white jacket. I decided to give online shopping a go and found this jacket which fits the description of what I had in mind perfectly! It fits nicely with a good allowance for thick clothing. There are 3 pockets outside and 1 inside. The stuffing is made of down and it has got a nice weight to it.

All in all I am quite pleased with this purchase. Once I packed in my dogi I will be all set for my trip!

You got the better of me (for that day)

2011-02-08T18:10:00.002+08:00

A few days before Chinese New Year, I was driving on the highway back home after a function. I wanted to overtake a car in front of me and so I indicated to the right. As I was nearly halfway into the right lane the car behind me indicated and started to move to the right lane as well. The car looked as if it was accelerating at a speed much faster than mine so I moved back into the left lane. As the car behind me overtook me I saw the passenger (who presumably was the driver's wife and was holding a baby instead of placing the baby in the car seat) give me an angry stare.

Usually, I would just brush off these stares as nothing more than a waste of time and energy. But somehow I was very annoyed by the unwarranted stare. So I indicated once again and moved into the right lane. I started catching up to the car and it moved to the left lane. As I passed that car I looked at the driver, who was keeping his eyes straight ahead, as if trying to avoid me (or just being a safe driver). I zoomed off and within a few minutes I was back home.

As I parked my car I asked myself what have I accomplished by doing what I did? Did it make me feel any better? What did I actually get out of it? Nothing much, except for giving my car engine a good short run.

I would have never batted an eyelid on something like this and I honestly thought that I am beginning to mature, in a sense of seeing things as they are and not attaching any emotions or judgment to it. I felt so bad for letting my ego take over and doing something so pointless.

Guess I still have some way to go...

Hello DD 2011

2011-01-30T15:26:00.000+08:00

Enjoying her avocado

Daddy is..

..the fun factory!

The comfort of mother's embrace

Chinese New Year Lunch and Party at the office

2011-01-28T17:27:00.000+08:00

One of the team's mascot. It won a prize for best design.

A scrumptious lunch

After lunch there was bingo.

Rabbit making competition. It was good fun but a waste of the oranges.

Another one of the 4 rabbits made by the teams.

Timekeeper.

A lovely gift from one of the partners.

I need more time to recuperate

2011-01-24T23:38:00.000+08:00

It was my first night back at training after what seemed like a long week. I wasstill not feeling 100 per cent despite having had a slow Sunday. I reckon that if you have been deprived of sleep for the last 7 nights resting for a day is not really going to bring it all back! Whatever it was, I said to myself that I will attend training. True enough, my performance at the session was, well, not so good. I was sluggish and tire easily. No matter, after I get back to my routine I should be up and running soon enough!

I took out the new hakama and belt that I order from a good friend in Tokyo. I was expecting to only collect when I see him at the end of next month but my brother very nicely offered to bring it them back for me :). So I get to break them in before the Hombu Instruction Tour. Speaking of which, I better get my fitness up because it will be an awesome but grueling seminar.

Finally I got the right length!

With your name on my belt, I am constantly reminded of your perseverance, dedication and unyielding spirit that defined you and inspires me. I love you.

Honno kimochi

2011-01-23T17:02:00.000+08:00

Thanks bro for the lovely gift!

Getting some rest.

2011-01-23T16:59:00.000+08:00

What an exhausting week it has been! I am glad to be able to get some rest today and recuperate before starting work tomorrow. My brother has just came back from Tokyo and bought us a lot of goodies to enjoy. I really miss Japan and it does not help seeing pictures of friends having a good time holidaying in Japan either! Well, I will be in Japan again soon enough so I will get to enjoy myself AND train!!

Have a great Sunday everyone!

Tis the season to be busy

2011-01-16T10:53:00.003+08:00

So I will see you after a few weeks when thing are settled. Have a great Sunday!

Little Jack

2011-01-09T11:12:00.002+08:00

Yaaay I got to visit Mazzy and little Jack! Mom and baby are looking good. Jack is a handsome little boy! Whilst Mazzy and I caught up with each other I got to spend some alone time with Jack and take pictures of him, in and out of sleep. Enjoy!

Jack and mommy

Smiling in his sleep

Who are you and what's that black thing you are using to point at me?

Oh it's a camera. Ok I will smile and show you the dimples that I inherited from mommy.

But my patience quickly wears thin and hence I will show you something else that I inherited from mommy ...The classic M frown.

Warming the heart.

2011-01-08T23:56:00.002+08:00

The year is still new but somehow I can't wait for January to be over! There are many things happening at work and it has brought my stress to a whole new level. Saturday was another full day for me and I have to attend a night meeting before I could hit the sack. It so happened that the meeting when long (well that and the after meeting chat.

What cheered me up alot was opening the post box and finding greeting cards from some friends and teachers. One in particular I thought was very special. It is an advent calender card with pull up flaps showing the sights, tastes and toys of regional Japan. I think it was very thoughtful of the sender to give me this greeting card considering the fact that I told her I will be brining my mother (her first trip) to Japan for a holiday. Thanks Kana-chan!

Aftering admiring and sharing the card with my mom I decided that it was time to go to bed. In my room, I had a look at the books on my bookshelf to decide on bedtime reading. My eyes casted upon a wrapped bundle and I took it out of the shelf, unwrapped it and lay the book on the study table. I received this book as a gift from my dear Chin who made it herself, nearly 3 years ago. I kept the book for a purpose but it seems that the book will remain in in its unused state for some time. Hahaha. You will never know, there will come a time when I know that it is the right time to use this special book.

Chin, thank you again for taking the time to make this book for me. It is one of the items I cherish very much.

Alright. Off to bed I go. Goodnight everyone!

First keiko for 2011

2011-01-03T23:14:00.001+08:00

I am glad that the dojo did not take too long a time off before we start training for 2011. That being said I could still do my own training but I would still prefer to train with my fellow friends on the mat. It would be nice to have a few tatami mats at home!

When I arrived at the dojo sensei was holding a piece of paper. After we opened the dojo we went to the notice board to put up the piece of paper and immediately I knew what it was. Our roster. Sensei has arranged for us to take classes for 3 days in a row, in turns. N will take the first 3, then myself, and finally Chiong. This will go on until sensei's knee has receovered and he is well enough to take the class. I can see from my occassional glimpses at his expression during our training that he feels very left out, sitting there with his crutches next to him and looking on. I wish him a speedy receovery.

N sempai took the first class for 2011 and taught on katatedori shihonage and shomenuchi dai nikkyo. C wasn't feeling well so we were the only 2 yudansha in class that day. In a sense tonight's class was quite a relaxed class as I took turns training with all the juniors. After class N and iIpracticed on our suwariwaza locks and a couple others worked on their shomenuchi dai nikkyo. They were also very eager to improve on their kaiten ukemi and I spent some time with them on their locks and kaiten ukemi. I got to know the new students abit more and it was a friendly and relaxed atmosphere. I also used the opportunity to explain more about the dojo and training etiquette.

I've also prepared a brand new training notebook for 2011. I had one for 2010 but it was abit on the small side. Lefties apparently don't have visually pleasing penmanship (I get that all the time in the office) so writing small could aggravate other's poor eyesight as well as my own.

After arriving home I received good news from an aikido friend in Singapore; Horii shihan will be in Singapore on 2nd May 2011 for a one day seminar!! The last time I met him was in July 2009 MAA 15th anniversary seminars. I really enjoyed his session and his approach to training. I am so excited to be able to join his seminar again. I hope that some of our members will be able to attend as well. I better book my tickets!

With C and Horii shihan at the MAA 15th anniversary seminar.

If anyone is interested in joining the seminar, make your preparations now!

Happy New Year 2011!

2011-01-01T10:44:00.001+08:00

Wakey wakey its a new year!! First thing is to fill up the tummy with a good breakfast. I got the ingredients ready yesterday to prepare for a good start to the new year. 2 sunny side up eggs, 2 strips of bacon, sauteed portabello mushrooms and a glass of full cream milk. Happy tummy = happy Chui.

Happy New Year everyone!

AMA seminar 24-26 December 2010

2010-12-28T07:21:00.000+08:00

Tis the season to be jolly and I decided that I will spend Christmas this year at an aikido seminar and to support my sensei's sensei in his yondan grading. I missed out on the Friday evening session but had a full day on Saturday. The 2 sessions in the morning was taken by Zainuddin sensei and afternoon's double sessions were taken by Yusuf sensei. It was my first time meeting Yusuf sensei and it was a pleasure training in his session. I noticed that he consistently made one comment during training which is telling the students "relak. Relak. Relak!"

The night session was replaced by the grading session which was orinigally planned to take place on Sunday morning. I was uke for one of Zainuddin sensei's student for his shodan exams. The grading session took place for candidates going for Ikkyu, Shodan, Nidan and Yondan. As you can see it will not be a short one. The grading session was followed by a BBQ dinner.

The last session on Sunday was a 2 hour session jointly conducted by Zainuddin sensei and Yusuf sensei. In this session the senseis touched on the observations made suring the grading session the night before. Comments were made on technique, execution as well as etiquette. I took down notes of whatever I can remember during the seminar to share with my friends back home.

Congratulations to Zainuddin sensei and Suzalie sensei on their success at the yondan examinations and to all other successful candidates. As for those who did not make it, continue to train and another time will come for you to go to another level.

My last seminar for 2010!

Celebrating Winter Solstice

2010-12-27T07:40:00.000+08:00

Winter Solstice falls on 22nd December this year and as always it is celebrated by making the identifying food of the night, the glutinous rice balls or "tangyuan". The Winter Solstice occurs when the axial tilt of the Earth is the farthest away from the Sun and that means the daylight of the day is the shortest. The Winter Solstice is one of the most important festivals celebrated the Chinese. At the same time, it is also celebrated by others apart from the Chinese.

As a child I did not know much about this festival, known as DongZhi in Mandarin. In my mother tongue we call "tangyuan" as "siyang". The siyang is one of my favourite food and we would make it at times other than the day of festival itself. It is a simple and yet delicious dish which I have become rather good at. As of tonight I am officially the "Best Siyang Maker" of the family. Muahahaha. But seriously, it is a great pleasure for me to be able to make something (although simple) that satisfy the palates of my loved ones. It is a time of reunion and quality time.

Tangyuans are usually taken in sugar syrup and may have fillings of sesame, red bean paste or peanuts. I know that there are many more varieties these days but the ones that I have are very simple. And its the dry version too. I will use some pictures to guide you through the process of making our siyang.

First there's the glutinous rice flour. This is the brand that we use and glutinous rice flour from Thailand are of good quality.

Add water to the rice flour and mix to a very soft consistency.

Boil the rice balls in water. The rice balls will float to the surface once they are cooked.

In comes the yummy part. This is soy bean powder that has been fried and grinded to look the way it is now. the soybean can also be roasted in the oven if you don't like standing in from of the wok frying the beans away. Be careful not to overcook or roast the beans or you will get the burnt smell and taste in the powder. Add sugar to the soybean powder but take care not to make the mixture too sweet.

Scoop out the rice ball with a filter and mix in generous portions of the soybean pwoder and sugar mixture.

And the siyangs are ready for consumption!

It is very easy to make and if you do make some to try out please let me know what you think! Enjoy!

A Tree in the Dojo

2010-12-21T00:49:00.000+08:00

No. I could not avoid it. Sensei said that I will take class. Ok.

I led the class in warming up and stretching followed by some drills to show how they relate to execution of techniques.

I started with kosadori dai ikkyo which was a continuation of what C taught on Wednesday's class last week. C stopped at irimi and I continued on to finish the technique for both omote and ura. I focused the class' attention on the role that nage and uke plays and how in the execution of the technique it relates to the stretching exercises that we do. I also try to prepare the mental attitude taken during training. I ran thought some of the basic terms such as kamae, the different hanmi and the names of the attacks.

The second technique was yokomenuchi kokyunage.I explained the aspects of irimi and executing the technique with irimi tenkan as well as in a more static position (for the juniors). From that technique I moved to yokomenuchi shihonage to show the techniques are similar and at which point the similarities end. It was in this class that I realized that knowing something in your head is very different from bringing that same information thorugh your mouth! Hahahaha. Anyway, I tried my best to share what I know and understand at the moment. We are all learning everyday and learning takes on a new phase when you reach a certain level.

It was T's last session with us for this year and he will be going back to the UK for holidays. We will see him again next month. I brought a little Christmas tree and thought it would be apt to take a group picture. As you can see, sensei is still immobilized from his injury. There were some after class training and after I asked sensei for feedback about my conducting of the class. The reply was "a lot of things lah". Hahahaha. Hardly surprising. So I listen intently as he tells me his views and how it could be done better. I admit there are many considerations to take into account when you conduct a class. The personalities, the expectations as well as your own skill.

I also asked C to train with me on my ukemi. I am still stiff and fearful, or is it fearful and stiff? At one point I actually felt dizzy when I got up from an ukemi and I think that was the one when I really stiffened up. C said as a matter of factly that we need to train more. Yes I agree. We watched C's recording of his grading and he thought that it was really short, although when he was doing it felt like forever!

Christmas is just a few days away and if everything goes well, I shall be in KL this weekend for a good mat slamming session.

Tis the season to be jolly, fa la la la la, la la la la!

Season's greetings!

2010-12-20T23:35:00.001+08:00

I would like to wish everyone a happy and prosperous new year ahead. Let us all do our part in making this world a better place, for those who are with us, around us and those that will come after us.

Happy holidays and may the Force be with you!

Russian Roulette

2010-12-19T22:58:00.000+08:00

I attended the bersanding ceremony of Timah today who was my senpai at the dojo. She has since taken along break and will now embark on a new chapter in her life to start a family with her newly wedded husband. I wish her and her husband a lifetime of happiness in their journey together. The usual AD gang was there and as Timah embarks on her new phase in life so will we as AD members.

Sensei has subtly and not so subtly said to us there are responsibilities that lie ahead for us as the core members and seniors of AD. That includes taking a class now and again (and I'm being optimistic here). C has taken a class last week and N claimed that he took a class a week before. Sensei's injury this time round is quite serious as it was worsened with another mishap recently. If the injury is further aggravated it may mean going under the knife. So he is constantly reminded to err on the side of caution. He has about 3 months before we receive instructors from Hombu Dojo so we are all wishing him a speedy recovery.

In the meantime, SOMEONE has to conduct classes whilst we wait for sensei to be back in action. The shodans have been given the go ahead by our supervisor to teach, but formal appointment awaits. So...if I can help it I would like to be part of the class...hahahaha. Sensei says, "you people discuss among yourselves and deicde who will take the class."

Let's see who takes the bullet tonight. I better write down some notes now.

Practising harmony with a good friend

2010-12-17T23:49:00.001+08:00

It was very good to meet up with Bernie again after out last encounter in Brunei about just a month ago. I am very touched by the support that he gave us for our yudansha grading. He videotaped our grading and even made a dvd for us! I consider that as a very meaningful gift because it immortalizes the milestone in my aikido journey. Thanks again Bernie!

On the first night he took me to have Nepalese food since I have never had it before. We went to this place called Gurkha Palace It was a Sunday night and the place is just like Little India with so many people and activity. I actually enjoyed the scene. I can understand that leaving your home to work in some place far away and unfamiliar you would be happy to see your countrymen to get together and find about news at home. The place was full of good energy.

So here we are at Gurkha Palace

The tableware

The yummy dishes that we had.

This is similar to the guo tieh/gyoza.

Chicken masala.

The name of this yummy dish escapes me.

Garlic naan!

Delicious daal. Went very well with the naan bread!

On the second night that we met up Bernie brought a friend along who is also an aikidoka and we went to have some chicken rice. I find the set up to be quite western considering that chicken rice is a typically Asian dish. I was told that the eatery is located around an expatriate neighbourhood so that might explain the set up.

I like the colours. Very vibrant. Funny though that they choose the wrap the cutlery in paper instead of serviettes.

The yummy chicken rice!

The pork leg. Yum Yum Nom Nom...

We hopped over to the DIY yogurt store next door for some dessert.

Cookies and cream with almond rice for me :)

With my wonderful host Bernie and new friend Christine.

I wasn't sure whether I would have the time to join Bernie for training as I was actually on a working visit. Bernie was eager to have me join his class but I couldn't commit. I brought my dogi along anyway (as in all my trips) just in case. Luckily for me I managed to wrap up with client in time and since I had no plans on the last night in Singapore I decided that I would join Bernie for a class, which turned out to be a very good decision. Currently Bernie's dojo is located at Boon Tiong Road and classes take place on a void deck. We all helped out in laying the mats before training. The mats are the puzzle mats but not as tough as the ones that we have at BSRC. It was nice for ukemi.

Before class started I met Frankie sensei. He is over 70 years old but still training and teaching. I admired his determination as well as the passion he has for aikido. He asked me why I started aikido and told him that the reason was quite cliche but one of it is because I see this as a martial art that I can train for a long time. Frankie sensei is a testament to that. Of course due to his age he could not train as vigorously as us but I think you see the point. So barring some physical/medical reasons or other special circumstances, one can have a fairly long training life in aikido.

Bernie sensei's class lasted for 90 minutes and consisted of drills as well as technique. I was honoured to be asked to take ukemi for a nikkyo technique and I enjoyed training with almost everyone at the dojo. It was an easy and rather informal atmosphere. Bernie sensei reminded his students to train as instructed and put away the mindset that they have put up from other classes. I think this point could not be more over-emphasized. We attend class to learn from a teacher. Wouldn't that mean you learn from that teacher at that point of time? I find that some students don't empty their glasses, to speak figuratively, and make comparisons with what the instructor teaches to what they see on videos and learn from other instructors. I find that to be disrespectful . If you are not about to train as how your instructor teaches, I think you are wasting everybody's time. You are not prepared to learn.

After class Bernie invited his students for dinner and we got to know each other more. I had a great time and it was a wonderful way to end my last night in Singapore.

Group picture with members of Makoto Dojo.

Followed by dinner after.

Taking the class..who?

2010-12-16T17:30:00.002+08:00

Sensei is still recovering from his knee injury and apparently he is now also suffering from gout (yes yes, all those kambing) so he texted T to tell us that one of us will conduct the class on Wednesday night. So when I found out from T about sensei's instructions I could hear his oh-so-familiar words, "you cannot run away from this..you people have to conduct the class one day". I reckon that the day has come no matter how much protest and resistance given. I told N to take the class and the reply was, " I thought C is taking the class." Hahahaha. No one wants to do it but someone has to do it. So we decided to let C take over the class. I opened the class with warm-up, stretching and drill. I decided to do the drills a little bit differently to give the members a different perspecitive of looking at training. After that it was a 1 minute break before C takes over the class.

It was very good of him to take the class without any comment. He has a good attitude because the first thing he did was to look at the syllabus to decide what to teach. (I think from now on I better prepare my notes JUST IN CASE).

So, we started with kosadori ikkyo drill. Aite take turns with the entering movement but stops there. We did 20 repetitions on each side. After that we did yokomenuchi shihonage. C tried his best to explain the role of nage and uke on the execution of this technique and later on split the class and concentrated with the juniors on polishing the technique. As for the yudansha we did kosadori dai ikkyo to yonkyo. As I was training I noticed a few things that I would address in taking a class. I've got that down on my little notebook for reference so just in case if sensei decides to do a surprise "attack" on me...I am prepared for it.

I enjoyed watching C teach. I can see his growth as an aikidoka and as an individual. I've always admired his positive outlook in life and his commitment towards training in the given circumstances. Don't ask, just do!

It's not Friday??

2010-12-07T22:22:00.002+08:00

Today felt like Sunday. I guess that happens when your life becomes routine, routine and more routine. I work 5 1/2 days so if I wake up at any day where I don't have to go to work, I'll automatically register that day as a Sunday. It is not so bad unless the public holiday actually falls on a Friday. I abstain on certain foods on Friday and when my days get messed up, I'd be chewing on a piece of lamb and going, "something doesn't feel right...". I would promptly realize my folly and beat myself up internally for not being aware eventhough I have been practising abstinence on Fridays for more than a decade!

So, routine is good but can also be not good. It gives a system to your daily life but it also dulls the mind. It is like auto-pilot. You don't think but just do. I think that will not do. Whilst we try to create some sort of system and stability in our lives to make it more comfortable, we should not do so at the deprivity of thought and reason.

By analogy, when I train in aikido, it is the same techniques over and over again. Through routine and muscle memory I know how execute an ikkyo technique, but it is different each time. Different uke, different maai, different degree of connection, different physical response...but doing an ikkyo nevertheless. So if I execute the technique in each and each situation as if it is the same because it is an ikkyo move, I would find the result to be rather different. It is the same technique, but different every time its done. That is because you are executing the technique at that moment, in that time, with that person. So my mind cannot form an attachment to what I had done before. It was a combination of factors THEN. It is different NOW.

Its human to yearn for comfort, but let's keep awake.

James makes a visit

2010-12-06T23:36:00.000+08:00

It was nice to see James at the dojo tonight. He drove all the way from Seria to join us for training which is good timing as tomorrow is a public holiday.

Sharon in her element.

The boys having some after class practice.

First group picture after shodan grading :)

On a completely unrelated subject, I asked T about the comparison between a Mac laptop and other laptops to help me decide on getting a new laptop. Immediately the reply was, "you cannot compare other laptops with a Mac. It is in a league of its own." I guess I now know which is a good investment. Hahahaha.

Dyanna is growing up fast!

2010-12-06T07:19:00.001+08:00

After hearing the wonderful news that DD is teething and sitting up I decided to pay a visit to mommy and baby.

Lo and behold..Chin's beautiful princess!

I was very impressed as she is not even 6 months old when she started sitting up. I thought that usually sitting up is preceded by rolling over on the tummy but Chin told me that both sort of happened simultaneously!

DD is also teething so she's biting anything and everything that she grabs her hands on.

Some tender moments with mommy

I had a great time playing with DD and catching up with Chin about things that have bebn happening. I would go all soft when she coos and speaks her baby talk. Chin, it's been while since we got together and we should go out for drinks soon.

The journey begins.

2010-12-04T15:57:00.000+08:00

After having been sufficiently rested and my mind in a balanced state, I think I am ready to write about what happened last weekend.

Last weekend was one of sorts, there was good and bad, happy and sad and many others in between. That weekend also marked the fateful upgrading for a few of us. Sensei will be tested for nidan, whilst myself and 2 others will be tested for shodan. The RenRen brothers went for their 8th kyu upgrading and did well. We have been briefed and discussed about the requirements for shodan and I've also helped myself to articles concerning the road to that stage.

Shodan, as it is written in kanji, is - "初段". As someone who is reasonably proficient in the Chinese language, I read that term literally as "the beginning stage". As often being told, attaining shodan is the actual beginning in the learning of aikido. Before that it was sort of kindy aiki as my friend would put it. So by the time you reach the stage of shodan you should have a good basic understanding of aikido and its techniques. It is from here that you start "doing" aikido, for lack of a better term. That also means that you should be able to take ukemi where the technique involves a higher level of difficulty. In other words, you should be ready to take ukemi. Full stop. Some people are of the view that attaining shodan automatically means you can teach, but I hold a different opinion on that, partly based on the what I've said above.

So with that in mind, I constantly question whether I have what it takes to go for grading. I am slow in learning sometimes and can get very analytical, which paralyzes my training sometimes. It comes with some responsibility and possibly more given the situation we are in. So I kept telling myself that I am not ready for this. But what is the worst that could happen? I fail laa.. It's not the success of failure that I am concern with, I was just in the mood of escapism. Anyway, I readied myself for the time. I was also very comforted and encouraged by a show of friendship and support of a good friend who flew in from Singapore to join the seminar and support our grading.

It was all good until the time sensei announced that the grading will now begin. We started with the kyu grading which involved 6 candidates. Chin came with DD to watch the grading and that put a big smile on my face. Then are we moved to the ikkyu grading I started to feel nervous. Sweaty palms, butterflies in stomach and restlessness. And sure enough, out of the 3 I was the first to be called for the shodan grading. I bowed and shikko towards the examiners with my uke Charles. I emptied my mind and told myself to just do what I always do during training. No big deal.

We started of with katatori locks. Sensei's voice was loud and commanding and he kept saying, "continue! continue!" I knew that he wanted to see whether I would move to his pace under pressure. But I deliberately took my time. I was did not move very fast but made sure that it was a continous flowing move. Maai, hanmi, irimi tenkan, kuzushi, zanshin. I made sure that it was there for each and every technique I executed. I couldn't remember what I was tested on before after the first command it was just me and Charles. During locking I took my time, giving myself time to calm my mind and for my uke to have enough rest. But deep down I felt really nervous, although I tried my best to look calm. Keep to regular breathing and a good long exhale as I finish my lock.

The grading seemed neverending and all I heard was "Next technique! Continue!" I felt that I was moving around in the circles and next thing I know it was "jiyuwaza!" on different attacks that ended with a nikkyo ura lock. Finally "suwariwaza kokyuho!". Ahhhhh yukata...its over! As I bowed to the senseis who graded me, I heard a loud round of clapping at the background. Happy with the encouragement, I am just glad that it is over.

The next to follow were N and C. I recorded their grading and felt proud of them, as they executed one technique after the other, as a showing of the dedication, time and effort that Saturday sensei spent on us, as well as the training that we put in all these years.

PH was happy with my grading and said that I did quite well, but to be honest I haven't a clue what happened during the grading. I will find out when B passes me the cd of my recorded grading. Hehehe.

I had my first training session last night and it feels like any other session. If anything I feel the responsibility to train that much harder and to help in anyway I can, towards the training of my junior. Alot of things are on my mind now but I am going to just take it one step at the time. Train train and train.

At the end of the day, I went home and took out the kuro obi that I bought a few months earlier and reflect on what had happened since I started training 3 1/2 years ago. I trained steadfastly, quietly and obediently in what I think is a martial art that encompasses the ideals that I grew up with and held onto. I thought of my late grandfather and what a great man he was. Attaining shodan is merely the beginning but it is also a significant milestone in my life. I want to be able to do this for as long as I can. It will be wonderful journey with alot of ah-ha! moments.

This one is for you grandpa. I love you.

A Bento Story

2010-11-19T23:38:00.002+08:00

Some of you may not know, I have a thing for lunchboxes. I look at lunchboxes so often my mom will sigh at the sight, just as how I would sigh when she looks at the pots and pans. Hehehe.

Anyway, I have now have a decent collection of lunchboxes and use them as often as I can. I even have a lunch jar gifted by my colleagues because that is the only thing they are sure I would want. That lunch jar will feature in another post, hopefully.

My lastest lunchbox is Lock N Lock set from Hua Ho. There were 2 types of lunchboxes but I choose this because the top layer has 3 compartments which I thought would be more useful than the other with 2 compartments (don't ask me why...). They didn't have white so I chose my next favoured colour, red. I had used it a few times and I am surprised that the volume of food contained in this small lunchbox set is actually sufficient for my diet. It looks very small compared to the lunch jars and other lunchboxes that I use but then again...like I said, its size is good enough for my stomach.

I did a fair bit of research on the effects of plastics on food and finally decided that PP5 plastic is reasonably safe to use.

Chin said that she wants to see what food I put in it so here it goes.

Fridays are days of abstinence for me so no meat will be featured in my lunchbox. I can eat fish but sometimes I go vegetarian altogether. I like to eat my meals cooked on the day so you RARELY see overnight food in my lunchbox. I was quite rushed today so this meal is very simple. Calrose rice, beaked beans, stir fried broccoli and tuna chunks seasoned with olive oil, lemon and spring onion. So I have my carbohydrates, protein and oils.

The lunchbox set comes with a keep warm zip bag and a set of plastic spoon and fork.

It is really a very small set. I should have put my hand next to it as a comparison of size. All in all I am very please with my purchase. Hopefully as I make my bentos I will remember to take pictures of them.

A rainy Sunday

2010-11-14T23:37:00.002+08:00

I wasn't thinking of doing some housekeeping today but then I got a call early in the morning from sensei to say that he can't conduct class at Seria because he is having dizzy spells. He might have to cancel class if there is no substitute. So I contacted T and we went down together. T is going to take the class and I would be his uke.

T and I had a good chat on our way down to Seria. We arrived half an hour earlier and I did my own stretching. The class consisted of drills for ukemi. What T stressed on is not far from what sensei has benentalking about, but the difference is in the manner and articulation in delivery. With the choice of words and the way they are spoken, the impact can be QUITE different.

I was given 30 minutes of alone time with P to practice techniques for his Ikkyu grading at the end of this month. P wanted to do some tantowaza. As far as I remembered we did yokomenuchi irimingage, shihonage, kaitenage, kotegaeshi and gokyo. We repeated the same techniques with tsuki attack.

After suwariwaza kokyuho everyone lined up after sorting out his/her dogi. T then went to each and every member to adjust seiza position. Opening of the chest, straightening the back, lowering the shoulder. There is a big piece of mirror in front of us and everyone can see the difference after the adjustment. I was the only one that did not need adjustment. I know, there is no humility here. Hehehehe.

After class there was some sharing on aikido techniques and T and I had dinner before going back to BSB. Looking forward to training tomorrow.

Good night!

Happy birthday Charles!

2010-11-14T10:25:00.001+08:00

May the Happy Force be with you always!

Change is a constant in life

2010-11-05T23:47:00.033+08:00

I find it hard to believe but it's that time again - grading. I have never like doing it. Maybe because ..of few reasons. When I first started Aikido one of the things that attracted me to it is the "no competition" training. I like to think of it as training for self improvement and to resolve confrontation. Putting things back in its place as the saying goes. So I thought I can just come, train, make some friends, work out a sweat and go home feeling good that I am just bit by bit closer to becoming a "martial artist".

Then there was some change.

I started to travel for seminars. I made new friends. I shared my experiences with my fellow members of what's I have experienced training in a dojo from Bangkok to Manchester. I made more friends.

It didn't stop there.

My deepening passion for aikido became ostensible to many and it attracted some attention. I was given the opportunity to contribute by being involved in administrative affairs. Because I desire very much to see Aikido progress in my homeland, my involvement in administration became alot heavier. In a couple of days' time, I shall retire my term as the Secretary General of the BAF.

I said to myself, I wish I could go back to the time when I am just an ordinary member, training and enjoy the company of my friends. Now I have responsibilites.

As the change continues, my master tells me he feels that it is time for me to take my shodan test. Hmmmm (read it as - alot of reservation and reluctance). I had a good talk with him about it, as well as my STI. Bottomline, I guess I can't continue to just receive and not give. As much as I hate to admit it, in terms of rank I cannot stay where I am forever ( the issue of rank is another topic altogether which I may revisit in due course). So I must embrace that change and prepare myself as best as I can.

My fellow member who is also due for shodan grading at the same time is worried about his perfomance as a change in the job position made it very difficult for him to train as our usual times. I told him that we train whenever we can and see where that will take us. Last night, he committed himself to a training session with me. It was just the 2 of us and we trained for about 90 minutes before calling it a night. We agreed on a training pattern and offered feedback on the other's perfomance during training. I really enjoyed the training.

And yes, we have changed. We have come a long way since our days as a newbie on the mat. I am reminded myself of that everytime I see S training at the beginner's section. I wish her many years of good training ahead.

In 3 weeks' time it will mark another change in my life. There will be many more to come.

Whatever happens, change will always be there. Life is beautiful, isn't it?

A night out for music

2010-10-30T16:10:00.000+08:00

Arrival of the Guest of Honour Her Royal Highness Paduka Seri Pengiran Anak Isteri Pengiran Anak Sarah binti Pengiran Haji Salleh Ab Rahaman

Her Royal Highness presenting a mock cheque to representative of Pusat Ehsan Al-Ameerah Al-Hajjah Maryam

Città di Firenze

Performance by Leonardo Melani, Tenor

I had a great time.

2010-10-29T22:14:00.000+08:00

Chin decided to have dinner at Topaz for her birthday. I arrived at a quite restaurant. It was clean and tidy looking. The restaurant had been in business for nearly a year and I was wondering whether the lack of dining crowd was due to the quality of its food or simply because it was the "dry" part of the month for most locals.

My mock Sangria. It tasted something like a toned down version of san suan ping.

DD was feeling a little grumpy. She had her jab during the day.

The lamb shank was not too bad but was a bit dry.

H was reasonably satisfied with the pasta pesto.

Unfortunately, there was only one dessert available at Topaz so we swung over to Saffron for its delicious desserts.

My favourite! Warm chocolate pudding!

The heavenly pavlova

Chin liked this alot. Sticky date pudding.

Banana crepes. Thumbs up.

You're being too nice

2010-10-24T10:12:00.000+08:00

Can I change that? Do I want to?

"Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself"

2010-10-14T06:38:00.000+08:00

Familiarity breeds contempt. Normally we tend to take things or persons for granted after getting comfortable or close. We cease to extend grace and courtesies to each other. Sometimes that may extend to failing to carry out responsibilites or obligations altogether. No man is an island. Our acts, whether we know it or not, does have an effect on those surrounding us. Take some time to think about your acts, omissions or neglect and ask yourself whether you would have done the same thing to yourself. or allow the same to be done to you.

People remember you most for how you treated them. Relationships count alot in life.

Right or wrong?

2010-10-11T23:04:00.003+08:00

Everyone who practises martial arts and sticks to a particular one must have some reason for doing so. Maybe its philosophy appeals to you. Perhaps you had a very good teacher. Or simply the fact that it was developed by the race you were born into. Comparison is an unavoidable part of life, whether you like it or not. We inherently discriminate, impose/bestow superiority of one race, thing, system, organization or practice etc over another. Why go for the prawn when you can have the lobster?

I practice a martial art that was the creation of my race. I have been questioned by certain individuals as to why of all martial arts I had to pick one that was firstly, not created by my race, and secondly by a race that had committed such acts of atrosities upon ours.

You may recall vividly the scenes above from the movies Legend of the Fist and Fist of Legend. The plot was amongst others, along the lines of my-art-is-better-than-yours, you-are-weaklings-and-therefore-you-are-better-off-under-our-rule, unlike-you-we-are-patriotic, your-downfall-was-your-disunity. Somewhere along the lines some patriotic hero will come and crush his enemies in a most dignified manner and gain respect from the top man he defeated. Moral of the story? There are many.

Watching these movies do evoke emotions of contradiction within me. Some very very bad things were done, in this context, by one race to another (I am not saying that no other race has ever done bad bad things to other races or even among their kin). I am left contemplating in solitude. The art itself is good, or professes to bring a person to higher levels in mental and spiritual development, but very often marred by the behaviour of those who practices it.

Have you ever had the feeling of knowing that something is right for you? Take my baby brother for example. He was quite unsure of what he wanted to do as a career until his late teens (pretty normal I think?). When he made the decision to take up culinary arts, I see the resolve in him. Our parents didn't like it as they had a very conventional view of those who cook. But his resolve coupled with my mediation let him get his way. 18 months later he graduated. Seeing him working in his profession I thought to myself, "This is right for him" Recently he took up boxing. Again I thought to myself "that's so right for him!".

As for the emotions of contradiction I wrote earlier, I don't think I will find a perfect answer. I agree that we must analyse and evaluate in many of the things we do in life lest we make regretful decisions. But for some things however, I must follow my heart.

An open message

2010-10-04T17:28:00.001+08:00

To the person who was driving a vehicle with registration number *L2707 today at approximately 13:40hrs- for whatever egotistical reasons that caused you to drive in such an unsafe manner, please remember that we all (yourself included) have family and loved ones who wait for us to return home safely everyday. Please use the grey matter lodged in between your ear which is protected by a skull to consider carefully before you exercise anymore of your road bullying tactics.

Enjoy your evening.

Watch what you say

2010-09-03T17:45:00.001+08:00

I recently returned from a diving trip at Redang Island. Before returning home I stayed a night at my aunt's place, which was good timing as my cousin turned 13 on the evening that I flew back. We had a very nice dinner (grilled lamb, yum yum my favourite).

I spent some time alone with my aunt in the morning, catching up and watching her wrap presents for middle M. While we were chatting, I realized something and asked her where Cookie, their pet dog had gone to. My aunt stopped what she was doing and asked me, "Didn't you know what happened to Cookie? That was quite some time ago." She sighed and told me in a very solemn fashion, that Cookie is no longer with us. I was shocked and asked her how it had happened. In gist, she was in a state of anger over a family matter and accidentally ran over Cookie who was sleeping under the car when she was reversing the car out of the house. She recounted the story in detail and shed tears of regret, even after 18 months had passed by since the accident.

She said that she used to curse Cookie somewhere along the lines of "Die la!"at times when she was irritated with her. The kids will do that too although those words where not spoken with malice. Little M used to tell his friends in school that Cookie died as a joke but now Cookie really is dead. My aunt had to break the news to the kids and waited until they arrived home to do so. At first they thought my aunt was joking and called out fo Cookie. But when Cookie never came, they realized that mommy was telling the truth and burst into tears. After composing themselves they plucked some flowers from the garden and visited Cookie where she was buried.

One lesson my aunt learnt was never to curse, no matter how angry or out of control you feel. She has asked Cookie so many times to die and she ended up being the one that killed her. The pain must have been immense. I remember accidentally running over a newborn puppy some years ago and I cried with pain and regret as I saw the pup draw its last breath before the life went out of it. What more for a companion who has been with the family for some time.

Words are very powerful tools. Do not take them for granted. Do not say what you don't mean, especially when you are not in control of yourself. Words can forge/destroy, make/break and give/take away. Use them wisely. Be alert and aware of what you say. Sometimes silence is the best thing in a given situation, or just walk away.

RIP Cookie. You are in a better place now.

Getting Real

2010-08-26T00:33:00.000+08:00

Something happened at the dojo a few days ago that got me thinking.

It started from the blogpost "what's to gain from pain?" that I read on Memoirs of a Grasshopper. It talked about Congenital Insensitivity to Pain with Anhidrosis (CIPA), pushing pain thresholds during training and pondered on what pain can teach us. Reading about CIPA made me recall the post that I wrote on pain. From a religious and physical viewpoint I think it is essential that we feel pain. It is not a good feeling and can be downright nasty, but it there for a reason, to protect ourselves.

In the context of pain in training,and pushing the threshold of pain, I was reminded of the post above when a few of us stayed back after class to do some training of our own. Sensei was having the runs and needed to leave earlier than usual (our classes run for an hour but usually goes on for 90 minutes or more). He said we could stay back and trained somemore if we wanted. We said we would and we decided to work on our nikkyo pin. F is new and was taught an additional technique that night, which was shomenuchi dai nikkyo. J and I took turns taking ukemi for F and put in our 2 cents worth on correction/refinement.

F had a problem applying the nikkyo (ura) as she couldn't quite manipulate the wrist lock effectively. We took our turns volunteering our wrists to let her have a feel of applying the lock to a big hand and a smaller hand. Understandably it was she was havig some difficulty as this is a new technique for her. After some time J decided to apply the lock on her so that she could feel what the lock is like. J started very slowly and gently, with explanations on the progression of the movements applied the nikkyo. Completely unprepared for the intensity of the pain that followed, F screamed in pain (albeit softly) and withdrew her hand. J let go and asked if she was OK. She just kept smiling, as if she went through a real scare and was traumatized. I explained to her that it is pain is part and parcel of training. We are here to learn an art of self defence and pain is unavoidable. So far her training has been quite pain free, learning how to take ukemi, stretching and throwing techniques. She has learnt ikkyo but that pin is relatively comfortable compared to what she experienced that night.

She seemed to be in a hurry to leave the dojo, and I think I know why. When she had left, I asked J how she's going to be. J's answer was simple: "she must feel it."

It looked like she was in a comfort zone and that pin snapped her out of it. I don't know what she thought of aikido then but it certainly has changed now. Does the pain make it more real? With this brief but unforgettable moment, she will need to decide on whether it is something she wish to continue. If she wishes to, she will have to continue to endure the pain that comes with it. But if she thinks that she can't, then she may want to look for a replacement activity.

Christian Tissier shihan is coming to Singapore!

2010-08-25T23:20:00.000+08:00

Christian Tissier shihan, 7th dan

Mumei Shudan Aikido Dojo will be hosting a seminar to be conducted by Christian Tissier shihan, 7th dan from 12-14th November 2010.

For more details please visit Mumei Shudan Aikido Dojo's website.

I was all geared up to go to Singapore for what is going to be a wonderful time at the seminar but unfortunately I have an appeal to deal with the next day after the seminar ends so...Argh!

For those of you who are able to attend this seminar I wish you all a wonderful and enriching time on the mat with your aikido friends!

Self Interest

2010-07-25T01:33:00.000+08:00

How true..

"In this relationship called society, every human being is cutting himself off from another by his position, by his ambition, by his desire for fame, power, and so on; but he has to live in this brutal relationship with other men like himself, so the whole thing is glossed over and made respectable by pleasant-sounding words. In everyday life, each one is devoted to his own interests, though it may be in the name of the country, in the name of peace, or God, and so the isolating process goes on. One becomes aware of this whole process in the form of intense loneliness, a feeling of complete isolation. Thought, which has been giving all importance to itself, isolating itself as the `me', the ego, has finally come to the point of realizing that it's held in the prison of its own making."

Jiddu Krishnamurti - Commentaries On Living Series III Aloneness Beyond Loneliness

Learning how to breathe

2010-07-21T23:58:00.029+08:00

I had been bothered by the lower back pain last weekend and for the first time it extended for more than a day. My back was still sore when I went for practice on Monday so I decided that I will visit JAG therapy the next evening after work. I went there on Tuesday evening and lo and behold:- a sign that says that JAP Therapy will be closed from 17th July to 26th August 2010. Oh dear!!! No treatment!!! There was nothing much I could do but to drive across the street and console myself with a large portion of apom balik. I reckoned that it also had something to do with my sleeping on the sofa for the past one week. Oh well..enough said.

After resting for a day after Monday I decided that I was going to attend practice at the dojo tonight.As I stepped into the dojo I prepared my mind for practice. I started by putting on my hakama. I emptied my mind of all the things that happened today and left them outside the dojo. I took my time in tying my hakama and breathing normally at all times. I say that because we have the tendency to hold our breath when we are nervous , panicky or we encounter something physically difficult. That happens to me all the time but I did not realize it until a friend pointed it out to me. That is also why I tend to get tired easily during practice. I don't breathe. I stop breathing when I take ukemi and I ended up stiff bodied. That takes up alot of energy because your body is not taking in the oxygen it needs when there is muscular exertion. So I tell myself, I will start breathing from now on.

Which is just as well because sensei decided that we will practice throwing technique tonight. There were 4 of us seniors so it was just right. The first technique was kotegaeshi (from shomenuchi, yokomenuchi and tsuki attack). The second technique was iriminage (also from shomenuchi, yokomenuchi and tsuki attack).This time around I kept conscious of my role as an uke:- keeping eye contact with the tori, attacking without hesitation, keeping posture, regaining balance, aligning my centre to partner's and to breath! I make it a point to exhale heavily when I take ukemi to keep my body relaxed and supple.

This time around I actually feel purposeful during training. It wasn't just about bowing to your partner, train and keep connection. We always say that, keep connection but do we know what it takes to make it happen? Quite a bit actually!

Jerry, who's joined us a couple of weeks ago shared some useful tips with me about locking and being locked. Apparently I was tensed up when being locked and he showed me the difference. He also took ukemi from me during kotegaeshi and I was amazed at how light he was! Like throwing a feather!

Before the class ended I was asked to lead the cooling down. I did some stretching followed by some breathing exercise. When sensei ended the class we would, as we usually do, shikko to form a circle and after bowing to one another give an applause as a gesture of appreciation of the efforts made during training and shake hands for the friendship.

Another night that brought a smile to my face.

JENESYS Martial Arts dispatch programme

2010-07-15T22:29:00.003+08:00

I was very happy to see Irie sensei and Oyama sensei again after we first met in Brunei in March this year for the Hombu Instruction Tour. I did not think that I would see them again since I've heard that Hombu Dojo dispatches different instructors every year to countries under its development programme. So when JICE came up with the martials arts dispatch programme I was wondering who Hombu Dojo will dispatch this time. I was thrilled when I received the news. Hombu Dojo also sent a female aikidoka by the name of Nakada Akiko san. I met her 2 months ago at Hombu Dojo through Yokota sensei. I really enjoyed training with her.

JICE's martial arts dispatch programme involved 3 martial arts namely Aikido, Karate and Kendo. The training lasted 4 days with a martial arts festival and demonstration hosted by BJFA. The programme was conducted in collaboration with the Embassy of Japan and BJFA. The programme was conducted very successfully and this time we had the benefit of an interpreter Tezuka san who did a wonderful job bringing us closer together eliminating the language barrier. Miss Nomoto of JICE was very friendly and accommodating and it was a pleasure to have worked with her.

As for training some of us were worried that we would not be able to keep up with the training session or even last all 12 sessions. But 2 of us made it!

Then there was the demonstration. BJFA wanted a showcase from both and Japanese and Bruneian martial artists. We were concerned about doing the demonstration because we are such a new organization, and to be demonstrating along the ranks of Instructors from Hombu Dojo, pressure desu ne.. But under the constant guidance and supervision of Irie sensei the demonstration was carried out smoothly and everyone was happy with the result. As long as "inda memalukan" on our side we only do what we can deliver and not hope to impress with flashy but poor executed moves. As always sensei's demonstration was beautiful.

I am so glad that this programme took place and we could train more under Irie sensei. Oyama sensei took one session and we learnt alot about taking ukemi and being an uke. He emphasized on natural movements and kept saying "no posing, just natural". He implored us to think about what he shared and to be conscious about it when we train. That was the first time I took a class from Oyama sensei and I do like his approach as well. Actually I am always happy to train aikido whenever there is a chance. Empty your cup everytime and you'll learn something new.

Aikido is very new in Brunei and we need all the help we can get. I hope there will be more programmes like this. I cannot wait for the next seminar.

The passing of a giant star

2010-07-11T18:00:00.009+08:00

I received news from the IAF on its Facebook website that Tamura Nobuyoshi shihan, 8th dan, has passed away. I was very saddened by the news. It is a great loss to the Aikido community and my deepest condolences to Tamura sensei's family and friends.

I do not profess to know Tamura sensei personally, but I had the fortune to train at his session at the 10th IAF Congress and Seminar at Tanabe, Japan. I had started Aikido about one year before and was really very excited to join the Congress and Seminar. As always I would go right to the front when the session started and follow in earnest the warming up and stretching that followed. What caught my attention was the kokyu exercise that Tamura sensei did. In our training sessions back home, we would just stretch and start training. But after attending a few sessions before Tamura sensei's I had come to realise that this prelude to training is integral to what follows after. This exercise is to prepare one's body and mind for the training that follows and everyone has a different expression of how that preparation is to take place.

Although I do not understand the exercise at that time, I tried my best to follow as closely as I could. During the exercise sensei's eyes were closed and I could see the concentration and serenity that exuded from him. His movements were slow and controlled and seemingly relaxed. I could start to see how this would have an effect on the training later on, as if its preparing you to immerse into another world, a world of Aikido.

Thereafter training started. The most notable technique that was demonstrated as katatedori shihonage. That technique left a very deep impression in my mind because I saw how "immovable" he was. Tamura sensei would call anyone from the crowd and move them with ease. But when they were asked to do so it was like trying to move a big rock. Tamura sensei was even throwing men nearly 5 times his size! I remember exchanging looks of shock and admiration with HSB sensei when that happened.

I wanted to feel the technique from sensei himself. so I plucked up the courage to approach sensei as he was near me and asked him to show me the technique again. With a smile he a grabbed my wrist. He then gestured to the cameraman to come over so that this moment may be captured on film.

I was then asked to execute the technique.

Obediently I moved as I what I thought I saw. I could not move sensei. I tried again in several ways but still to no avail. He smiled at me at asked me to grab his wrist. Just as I grabbed his wrist sensei started to move and next thing I know I was down on the floor. I could not really articulate the process but it felt like he was moving me as part of my body. As I landed on the floor I looked at sensei. He smiled at me and asked me to continue with my practice. I tried very hard to remember that feeling all throughout the session.

After the session ended I went looking for Tamura sensei to take a photograph with him. I didn't have any sort of ID book from the federation or dojo for him to sign as a momento so the next best thing is to take a picture. Tamura sensei was really friendly. He grabbed my shoulder and happily obliged to my request. I felt like I was with my grandpa. I left the session that day with a very good feeling.

HSB and I met Tamura sensei again at Kumano before the demonstration started. I really liked his attire and was commenting to HSB on how cool he was. Again we asked to take pictures and this time I blinked my eyes when our photograph was taken. I asked for a second take due to my blinking and he said to me with a smile "next time, please do not close your eyes". From hindsight maybe he made that statement beyond the context of photograph taking? Make life a good ride, don't close your eyes!

Looking back at all this I am so glad that I went for the Congress instead of waiting until "you're more experienced or more learned or advanced blah blah blah". That is not true. I went because I wanted to learn as much about Aikido as I can. Time waits for no man and once you miss the opportunity it will never turn back for you. Because I made the decision to attend this seminar, I got to meet one of the aikido masters and O Sensei's direct students and trained under one of his sessions before he bid adieu to us.

You were a bright shining star in the realm of Aikido and now you would be in paradise, reunited with O Sensei. Rest In peace Tamura sensei. You will always be in my thoughts.

2010-06-30T23:20:00.001+08:00

It's been a crazy month. I am asking myself where did all 24 hours of the day go and there is always not enough time for this or that! I would like to spend a day or 2 not doing anything at all but just relax or vegetate. But no light at the end of the tunnel yet...so I soldier on.

Apart from work (so what's new)? I have been busy with some preparations for the upcoming Japan Brunei Martials Arts Festival. This is an event jointly held by Japan International Cooperation Center, Embassy of Japan and Brunei Japan Friendship Association. The festival will feature 3 Japanese Martial Arts namely Aikido, Karate and Kendo. The Aikido programme will run from 5th-8th July 2010 will training sessions to be held at Aikidamashii Dojo. There is a demonstration on Wednesday evening, 7th July 2010 to be held on the 8th Floor of Orchid Garden Hotel. I am going to be one of sensei's uke so we have been having separate training sessions to prepare from the demonstration. There are some concerns about what we are going to do for the demonstration because we are very new to Aikido. That sentiment is understandable so we try to keep it simple.

Last night we had some guests who were supposed to join us for a joint training session at 6pm to prepare for the demonstration but he decided to turn up at 7:15pm with different ukes named. So that means sensei cannot conduct his normal training sessions with other students. Good thing senpai N was there to help out with the kids.

It was very tiring as with all other sessions because we were at it non-stop. Being a slow and heavy uke certainly did not help! We stuck to the kihonwaza and at with tachi, hanmi handachi and at suwari. I got the tachi position which suits me just fine! C got the other 2 so it is alot more tiring for him I suppose. We managed to get a video recording of a segment of the training. I was very humbled by what I saw in the clip. I was tired, slow and not very responsive. And to think that all this time I thought there was some improvement in the way that I respond and move as an uke. I was rather wrong.

It is my sincere hope that I do not cause any problems for sensei at the demonstration. *fingers crossed*

I think this time around if possible I would want to request Irie sensei to teach us on how to be an uke. Without a good uke the traning would not be enjoyable. ( I know, it works both ways). It will be VERY VERY tiring for me the next week. Morning afternoon and evening sessions and these are not your social sessions where you get to adjust your dogi all the time and take frequent water breaks during training. This is the real deal.

One interesting point. A shodan from AMA is joining the programme and I am very much looking forward to training with our Malaysian counterpart. I am sure everything will turn out to be fine.

Minasan gambarimashyo!

You will always be in my thoughts

2010-06-24T23:48:00.000+08:00

I was looking the pictures in my laptop one night and saw this picture of me and my late granfather. He has been gone for a little over a year now but I still find it hard to accept that he's left us. He was a man of few words but has a strong presence amongst us.

I think of him often. It is natural that you would think of his goodness and the things he has done and how much more sensitive and appreciative you could have been towards him when he was still with us. But that only shows that I have perhaps like the others, took him for granted more often than appreciating him.

It is the first time that I lost a loved one. I cannot even begin to imagine going through eventual similar experiences as time catches up on us and the Lord calls for us home. But that is life. There is a beginning and an end. We have to make the best of what happens in between.

Cherish those who ARE with you now, instead of realizing what you missed and thinking about them all the time after they are gone. You should be thinking about them when they are still here, when you can see them, talk to them, hold them and tell them how much you love them. Be alert and aware. Time waits for no man. Live with love in your life.

Self-knowledge cannot be gathered through anybody

2010-06-22T07:38:00.000+08:00

Jiddu Krishnamurti:

That is why it is important, as I said, to understand the process, the ways of our own thinking. Self-knowledge cannot be gathered through anybody, through any book, through any confession, psychology, or psychoanalyst. It has to be found by yourself, because it is your life; and without the widening and deepening of that knowledge of the self, do what you will, alter any outward or inward circumstances, influences - it will ever be a breeding ground of despair, pain, sorrow. To go beyond the self-enclosing activities of the mind, you must understand them; and to understand them is to be aware of action in relationship, relationship to things, to people, and to ideas. In that relationship, which is the mirror, we begin to see ourselves, without any justification or condemnation; and from that wider and deeper knowledge of the ways of our own mind, it is possible to proceed further; then it is possible for the mind to be quiet, to receive that which is real. - Ojai 4th Public Talk 24th July 1949 Collected Works, Volume 4

Some random thoughts reflected in a famous quote

2010-06-21T18:48:00.006+08:00

"To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it around carefully with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket - safe, dark, motionless, airless-it will change. It will not be broken; it will be become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable."

C.S Lewis

Visiting Princess Dyanna

2010-06-20T23:19:00.000+08:00

It has been a while since I last posted on my blog. Many things have happened but I couldn't bring myself to type it out on the computer. Work has been crazy eversince I returned from my personal and office trip last month and I haven't been training aikido for about 3 weeks now. Not a happy camper. But that is how it is in life, you CAN'T have it all. Hahahaha.

Now to something very joyous.

My buddy Chin gave birth her first child last week and is blessed with a beautiful princess by the name of Dyanna H. Chin said I will be D's chinese godmother so I get to speak Mandarin to her. I arrived at about 8:45pm last night and Chin was breastfeeding D. D looks so adorable with that head of hair and glazed eyes. Chin the mother looks gorgeous and glowing for a mother who's just given birth. You know how they are usually, tired and haggard form all that labour and delivery and endless feeding sessions as well as inadequate sleep. But I don't see any of that from Chin! I think all moms should look like that!

Seeing D made my maternal instincts come back with force. I had wanted very much to hold little D in my arms but is afraid that I won't do it right. So godma will wait until you're a little bit bigger before I hold you. Needless to say seeing you little D makes me want to have a child! Sigh. But of course, I quickly tell myself that God has plans for me.

This picture was taken after I obtained consent from Chin. D had just finished an hour long feeding session and is looking perky indeed. She kept giving that pouting look and I was wondering whether she was still looking for milk. Chin put her finger on the side of D's lips and if D follows that means D wants milk. D did not follow Chin's finger. Not looking for milk.

I took a few more pictures but stopped soon after because I didn't like the fact that the red focus light kept shining on D's face whenever I was about to take a picture. I did manage to take a picture of D's smile though! She looks alot like her mommy here.

I will see you soon little D. Drink lots of milk and sleep lots. Love you!

Happy Father's Day

2010-06-20T20:20:00.000+08:00

Happy Father's Day to all celebrants.

I won't be celebrating Father's Day this year. My father is in East Timor and unreachable as he is up in the mountains. My maternal grandpa is having his own party with the Lord. But I did wish him Happy Father's Day and gave him a kiss on his forehead :-)

Many thoughts are running through my head which I will not articulate here.

It is enough to know that I love you.

Can't get you out of my head

2010-06-03T17:40:00.002+08:00

How should I put this?

I haven't felt this way for a long long time.
I couldn't stop thinking about the time we spent together.
I long for your company and embrace.

Hmmm...I think something is going on here, something that is not logical neither is it tangible. But I am pretty sure that something is going on.

Welcoming 2010

2009-12-31T16:32:00.003+08:00

May the year ahead be one with blessings of love, health, joy and success to all!

Heading towards gemuksville

2009-12-30T07:04:00.000+08:00

It's official: I am heading towards the land of abundance!!!

As I look through photographs of myself over the past 10 years, I realized that slowly but surely I have changed in my physical outlook. Yes I somewhat matured and there is more feminity oozing out of me, but some part of my body are also oozing with excess lemak. I would know why- as you hit the 30's your metabolism slows down and its all part of the aging process. but then again, the fault of such weight gain is entirely mine.

I have a tendency to overindulge. I have a sweet tooth, very sweet tooth. I still eat like I do during my tennis days. I snack at night. I LOVE to eat. I think you get a very good picture of what I am trying to say.

Bottomline, very little self control.

I started gaining weight in my late 20's and that sent me on a downward spiral of low self esteem and mild depression. I wanted to lose weight but couldnt overcome my demons. Then I met a friend who showed me how he did it. He explained to me that the most imporant thing about losing weight is to have a balanced diet. Exercise is a supplement. What matters is what goes in inside your body and if you don't sort it out no amount of exercise will help.

Raise your metabolism I was told. I started eating 5 times a day. My meal consists fo 40% proptein, 40% carbohydrates and 20% healthy oils. Weight loss should be gradual and no more than 2 pounds a week. No fried food, no sugar (NooooOOOoooooo!) , no alcohol ( not a problem as I don't drink) and no processed food.

Go on calorie deificit. If I need 2000 calories a day to lose weight I'd take in only 1500 calories. Divide that by 5 meals and its 300 calories per meal.

Burn more fat with weight training. I'd do my cardio in the morning and weights in the evening. Later on I would just exercise in the evening and do alternate weight training plus core conditioning.

I did that for 2 years and never felt better. I look good and feel good. But after that though I started to go on a sweet tooth rampage and gained back the weight. For someone who's on the extreme end of the spectrum I've come to realize that I need to do things with moderation. I can still do my 5 meal thing but I need to control what I eat. I can still indulge on my likes but I must not overdo it. Only that way can I maintain lifelong well-beingness.

So what went wrong? I have gained 2 inches on my chest, 5 inches round my waist and 2 inches round my hips.

I know what went wrong. Please refer to paragraph 3 above.

I want to be healthy, I want to feel good about myself. I want to live a meaningful life and do the things I want to do. I want to still have full function of all my faculties after retirement right until the time the Lord calls me home. But all this takes work and effort and I am not doing it.

As 2010 approaches, I have in my mind a goal. It is not to lose as much as I can so I can look nice in my clothes. Neither is it so satisfy my vanity. My goal to to achieve physical well being.

Have a great year ahead everyone.

New Addition

2009-12-15T07:28:00.001+08:00

After having made my first order of dogi through a friend, I have discovered the joys of dogi shopping. Hahaha. After 21/2 years of training, I went from the 40 bucks" its-not-a-dogi dogi" (the belt kept riding up my waist), to Aididas judo gi (that went 2 size smaller) and a "B" brand dogi that should really not be used in a country with an equatorial climate. So I thought its time I get the summer dogi. The first pair were from Yamato. It has a good but tough texture. I thought to myself maybe it would be good to have 2 more sets as I train mkore or less 4 times a week. That way I only use each dogi once a week.

I ordered one set of dogi from Shirakawa and another from Suzuki through a friend in Japan. I was rather excited when I went to the post office to collect my goods. Aren't we always excited about new things??

This is the Shirakawa dogi. the first thing that struck me was how white the dogi is. Bleached maa. This dogi is a stiffer type compared to the one I ordered from Yamato.

It came with my name embroidery but it wasn't as nice as the embroidery on the other set.

When I took out this set I like it instantly. The material is soft and smooth. The pants is so comfortable you could use it as your PJs. But then again I don't...nevermind. Let's not go there. By the way this is the yomogi which is an anti fungus dogi.

The name embroidery is ostensibly better than the last one.

And this is an added bonus which incurred my great pleasure. No more complaints about my jacket opening up all over the place during training!

I have since used both sets of dogi and I do prefer the second set. The first set is very stiff and the collar often gives me problems at the side of the neck though continue friction. It's very uncomfortable to train with collar burns especially if you're someone like me who sweats buckets. Depending on how it goes I may order 2 more sets and a hakama next year. My hakama looks very weathered now and it is time to get a replacement.

Sweet Temptation

2009-12-14T18:00:00.005+08:00

I was telling someone the other day about my love for chocolate pudding. There is this place in Jalan Muara that I would go to to have my chocolate pudding with my "kaki". He suggested that I should try out the warm chocolate pudding with ice cream at Saffron. I've never heard of it until now. What got me interested is the quality of chocolate used.

What happened after I took the first bite? I had 7 servings in 2 weeks. Enough said!

"PAK!"

2009-12-01T07:30:00.004+08:00

Image courtesy of Martial Artist

This month sensei, NTC and myself agreed that we should set aside extra time apart from regular training to fine tune whatever we have been training. We have been talking about it for a long time now and it is great that it has finally come to pass.

We started our first session yesterday evening. We just did alot of repetitions on kihonwaza, taking care on our footwork. Most of the time we focus on the upper body and neglect the lower, resulting in a somewhat less dynamic movement because of our small/weak tenkan etc. It was tiring and more tiring for sensei and NTC because they started 40 minutes earlier.

During training we would give feedback to one another on how we felt about the techniques that are being performed and what needs to be improved. Then sensei asked us if there was anything in particular that we wanted to train and I suggested, "how about koshinage?". Immediately I got a look of dread from my senpai. Ahhh, the much dreaded and avoided technique. To be honest there is no helping it. As part of a group of aikidokas that is interested in sharing and training with others, I personally feel that aikido training is also about overcoming your fears.

I find that most either fear or find aikido difficult because they fear falling. No one like to fall and certainly be made to fall or kiss the ground. It is part of our ego. As one of our visiting sensei once told us, we practice ukemi to crush our ego, and build it up again (with paraphrase). One is afraid that he may not take the fall safely or injure himself here or there in the process. My fear is doing koshinage.

I don't want to do the nage/flip because it seems so strenous on the body. Plus I have an old lower back injury and I would still like to walk on my feet for as long as I can. But iIam among friends and ones who value safety in training. Since there are only the 3 of us why not? I am sure we can practice this safely. After training for 30 months it is about time.

In the end we simulated everything, short of executing the technique. As a compromise we decided to train our nage. We tried using the training method that judokas used, where one kneel on all fours and the partner attempted to do the nage by holding on to the flaps of the dogi on the kneeling partner. I had so many thoughts running through my head before I moved and it proved to be a big big mistake. I had to learn how trust my sensei, my partner and myself. so in the end, I said to myself if I need to face my fears and just do it. the first few times I landed incorrectly and there was some pain on my upper back and my shoulder but I continued with it. NTC also did the same and we started building up confidence along the way.

When sensei saw that I had got the hang of it he asked to changed the method of training to be the uke for kotegaeshi. Both the uke and nage are stationary with the nage holding the uke's wrist in the reversed manner. We chanted one, two, and on three nage tenkan and I went "foooooooo...pak!" Sometimes it is ok and sometimes I would bang my toes. Ouch. But on the final round, I did the nage where sensei and NTC said, "That was good. That was good."

I was delighted. I decided to stop there to savour the moment and give my body a rest. Learning the nage was not jsut for myself, but I wanted my partner to have the benefit of having a wider repertoire during training.

Well, I am very happy with the training and there is a long way to go. I can't believe I pulled it off and I am thankful to sensei and NTC for their guidance and assistance.

The rain makes me feel like taking a long nap.

Memories

2009-11-20T12:05:00.002+08:00

I was thinking whether to attend a funeral of a colleague's grandfather.

I was afraid that I would break down during the visit.

That would look very strange considering the fact that I do not know my colleague's late grandfather at all.

But he went to my late grandfather's funeral.

I should show the same support. Its only right I said to myself.

I decided to wear my late grandfather's watch.

3 of us went and I was doing well.

We were invited to pay our respects and that's when the dam broke loose.

It was as if I went back time to 8 months ago, when my late grandfather was lying in the casket.

I still cannot believe that you are gone, but at the same time I want to believe that you are at a better place.

Remember the time when you were in the medical plane, all strapped up and ready to go Singapore for what would be your last operation?

We took turns to go into the plane to speak to you.

I held your hand and told you that I love you, that you will get well and it will be fine.

I do love you. I really really really really do.

I love you ngiung...always have, still do and always will.

Have fun in heaven.

A weekend in KK

2009-11-18T07:13:00.011+08:00

My mom and I went for an overnight trip to KK to do a few things which I am pleased to inform that all got done. We did not book a room at my mom's usual hotel, Promenade Hotel as a friend of mine that suggested that I try out Myne Hotel located in Warisan Square. Our flight landed at 9:00hrs so I did not get to see the room until 14:00hrs. In between my mom and I went to this place in KK Times square to do a health check and also indulged oursalves in a near 2 hour massage. What a good nap I had!

Upon checking in this is what I got. Pictures below were taken with my SE W508.

The beds were clean and mattreses were not too soft.

Entrance to the room. It has a LCD TV but the reception was not very good. Pictures were grainy on some channels.

Dressing area. There is a DIY safe deposit box.

Shower room with Panasonic water heater. There was a good array of toilettries which I did not expect. What you see on the shower room door is not just a decoration but the metal straps comes out as clothing hooks. Pretty dandy the design is.

View from the entrance. The room is quite small but it is new and clean. For the room I booked it comes with windows but you cannot open them. My only complaint was the air conditioner which gave us alot of problems in terms of the temperature and timer control. My mom hates it when the room is not cold enough and only after 3 trips made by the mechanic the problem was fixed.

The hotel is located in town centre and is in a shopping area so food and shopping is not a problem. There is a promotion going on for the hotel's opening so the superior room was going for RM158.00 nett per night. Somehow my mom and I couldnt quite get used to the food in KK (or maybe its just not prepared properly) the next morning we were stricken with a "lau sai" special for the whole morning. As a result we spent a good part in the room in the morning.

Saturday night I got to meet up with an old friend of mine Zar who's flown in to KK from KL with her colleagues in setting up their counter for the soon to be opened MetroJaya. After many missed opportunities in the year we finally got to meet. As usual time was too short but we managed to have a photgraph taken to commemorate our meeting. She looks really good. Check out the difference in the size of our arms! Hehehehe.

The next day, after breakfast and spending a good part of the morning in the hotel room, we checked out and went to Starbucks to wait for an aikido friend to pick me up for Zainuddin sensei's class (arranged in conjunction with my visit to KK. How nice.). While mama and I were sipping on our drinks and chatting away we noticed this man sitting next to us just outside the cafe. He was acting strangely and the next thing we know he moved to another table further away. I noticed that he was eating a piece of pastry left behind by a previous customer and savouring the leftover. He also went over to abother table asking a customer for a cigarette. He smiled like a child when was given one. I took a picture of him sitting in contemplation as he was taking his smoke.

If one takes the time to see down anywhere and just see the world goes by, you would be in for a store of things. Being a loner it is something that I do quite often in my solo outings. Of course this time I had the opportunity to point this out to mama. But it does make me take stock of my life, and to tell myself to stop comparing myself to others when gauging myself in terms of happiness or success or anything in that matter. We are all born with a reason, a journey to make, a purpose to fulfil and a story to weave. Behind every face there is a story, but let's make our own as abounding as we can.

Living from moment to moment.

The tremendous need for attachment

2009-11-16T12:30:00.001+08:00

Our relationship is possessiveness, attachment, various forms of intrusion upon each other.
What is attachment? Why do we have such tremendous need for attachment? What are the implications of attachment? Why is one attached? When you are attached to anything, there is always fear in it, fear of losing it. There is always a sense of insecurity. Please observe it for yourself. There is always a sense of separation. I am attached to my wife. I am attached to her because she gives me pleasure sexually, gives me pleasure as a companion; you know all this without my telling you. So I am attached to her, which means I am jealous, frightened. Where there is jealousy, there is hatred. And is attachment love? That is one point to note in our relationships.

Mind Without Measure, pp 80-81
Jiddu Krishnamurti

An expression

2009-11-10T08:00:00.003+08:00

We were strangers you and I
A decade plus 2 years ago
Its from there the process starts
Knowing you and knowing me

3 years passed and I went home
Hoping I could stay behind
But like the rivers to the sea
Our friendship grew and grew

Sometimes we don't talk so much
But we would know what to do
Our silent moments are indeed golden
Knowing you and knowing me

Talk we do of everything
We laughed we cried we embrace in love
Through all the years good or not
Our friendship grew and grew

Made of all things strong and good
You are God's fine piece of work
How I cherish our bond
May it last in eternity.

Departures

2009-10-29T21:07:00.001+08:00

I finally got my hands on the dvd for the long awaited movie "Departure". I tend to go for international movies when making selection for in flight movies and this movie caguht my eye. At the time of selection I was not aware of the rave reviews it attracted or the nominations given. I am very much into most things Japanese and is recently addicted to watching "batsu" game shows. to get an idea of what a batsu game is, please read the information here.

I digress.

During the numerous recesses I took in writing this post I originally intended to give a synopsis of the movie but then again after having benefit from the recesses I decided that I wasn't going to spoil it for anyone.

It touched on death, taboo subjects, discrimination and social conditioning with other related topics. It was a quiet movie in a sense that there wasn't a lot of dialogue, but the silence and acting skills deliver a powerful imagery and message.

It also made me cried buckets too.

2 thumbs up for this movie! go grab yourself a dvd now!

Of my tools

2009-09-15T17:30:00.003+08:00

It was just another day at work.

There were many files to clear and much drafting to be done. It came to a point where I thought a short break would be in order. So I put my pen down and closed my eyes for about a minute. When I opened my eyes its gaze happen to be upon one the tools of my trade, my trusty pens.

Like all other things, there is a story behind these writing instruments. Eversince I started cursive writing ( I am very grateful to the teachers of At. Andrew's school who made us all learn it when I started Secondary 1 after spending 6 years in Chung Hwa school previously), I grew to be fond of fountain pens. Ink stains on my thumb and middle finger is a near daily occurence and I would never miss the fountain pen counter on our family weekend outings at the departmental store. Actually it was just Yaohan then. Before that it was Klasse. Hehehehe.

In the time of computers and keyboards I remain true to pen and paper. It is just not the same writing with a pen compared to writing using the keyboard. That personal touch is missing.

One thing I love is to receiving and reading letters from friends and family. Those letters are testaments to the love and thoughts as expressed through the movements of their own hands. I don't really know how to put it across articulately but I hope you get the idea. I kept all the letters that I received in a box and time and again I will take them out and read it. When the family was moving house last month I took out the letter that my (then) little brothers wrote to me. It brought back so many memories. I could imagine the look on their adorable faces as they wrote, sealed and posted that letter, with their thoughts of and affection for me.

Ok moving on.

What you saw in my pen case are the 3 most used pens.

This is the first fountain pen that I used and also my favourite. My father gave it to me when I was whining about not having a fountain pen of my own. It has a broad nib and a very smooth feel. You can see the ravages of time on the cap. This is pen is about 3 decades old. I use it mostly for drafting.

This MontBlanc Meisterstruck ballpoint pen is a gift from my uncle after he knew that I has passed my LLB Finals. When he handed this pen to me he told me " Chui, I hope with this pen you would do what you think is good and right." A motto I practice in whatever I do.

This Sheaffer fountain pen is a birthday gift from my senior and colleague. The most recent addition to my fountain pen collection and is currently occupying the last slot in my pen case. It has the initials "SW" which I use at work. It has a medium nib and I generally use it to make amendments and take short notes.

This Lamy fountain pen is for "rough use". It has a medium nib and resides in my office room.

This Pilot G3 has a 1.0 nib which is the broadest thus far. Great for signing letters especially the waxy ones.

Ahhh...this Pilot G2 1.0 pen is my correction pen. I am quite fastidious an tend to make alot of amendments when it is called for and I use this pen to make sure that the secretaries don't miss my amendments. The red ink plus my "unique" penmanship is a source of neverending sufferance for the ladies. I am a leftie after all. He he he.

Last but not least, my Pilot Shaker mechanical pencil. Mostly used when I am updating legislation. It is used together with my correction pen. I started using Shakers when I was 12 and was devastated when I lost my collection of Shakers that I had with me for over 15 years. I bought this from Hua Ho 2 years ago together with a black version of it. I was so so happy that they have Shakers in white.

There you go. My tools. Its use, like many other things, has an impact not only on the person who uses it but also those who made it and those who receives what come out of it. So whenever you express yourself through these wonderful tools, give them a thought as they certain deserve the same.

A treat for my eyes

2009-08-07T12:37:00.003+08:00

Between Denzel Washington and John Travolta...its Denzel any day.

Lunch with family

2009-07-30T14:31:00.003+08:00

I have been eating out quite often lately due to several reasons but mainly so that I can spend some time with my family. We had lunch at a restaurant near No. 2's workplace and I was also missing the "fried meat" that No. 2 ordered yesterday. Since No. 3 has yet to taste I seized upon the opportunity to order the same dish.

Wet fried noodle with mata lembu as ordered by No.3

Yes the tasty "fried meat" that has left me craving for more!

Mama's sweet and sour pork rice.

My ginger steamed free range chicken. Not very impressed with it. I guess I don't like eating this dish cold.

The quest for chocolate pudding

2009-07-28T14:26:00.008+08:00

I read from a website somewhere that there is this place which serves a decent chocolate pudding/fondant/lava cake. Excited, I enlisted my Chin Chin to go try it out. She did not have high hopes for this outing as somehow she feels that she'd be disappointed. We are quite, if not very strigent on the standards for this dessert. That is because (the word "because" to be said with a slight drawl) it is our bonding food. So it has got to be a very good one that is.

We started off with having lamb with gravy for our main course. For the price we were charged I find it acceptable. The mash potatoes were not bad but certain pieces of the lamb were tough to chew.

Then came the dessert. Hmm ice cream is outside instead of on the pudding. Hmmm crust looks too light coloured. Hmmmm. *scrutinizes*

As I took a closer look, the texture of the crust looks like that of a cake which looks to thick to be that of a chocolate fondant.

As suspected. Too thick and gooey. I have read the history of how the chocolate fondant came about but this really looks like an unbaked cake!

I could only finish the crust as I could not stomach the molten chocolate. It was more buttery and chocolatey. *shipai da*

Verdict: I would not order it again.

On one of those acts I find most unpleasant

2009-07-24T02:18:00.003+08:00

"…Throughout life, from childhood, from school until we die, we are taught to compare ourselves with another; yet when I compare myself with another I am destroying myself. In a school, in an ordinary school where there are a lot of boys, when one boy is compared with another who is very clever, who is the head of the class, what is actually taking place? You are destroying the boy. That’s what we are doing throughout life. Now, can I live without comparison—without comparison with anybody? This means there is no high, no low—there is not the one who is superior and the other who is inferior. You are actually what you are and to understand what you are, this process of comparison must come to an end. If I am always comparing myself with some saint or some teacher, some businessman, writer, poet, and all the rest, what has happened to me—what have I done? I only compare in order to gain, in order to achieve, in order to become—but when I don’t compare I am beginning to understand what I am. Beginning to understand what I am is far more fascinating, far more interesting; it goes beyond all this stupid comparison."

Jiddu Krishnamurthi
Talks & Dialogues Saanen 1967, p 86

Going to my second home for a seminar

2009-07-12T10:13:00.014+08:00

It was a great pleasure to be able to attend the 15th annual seminar held by the Malaysian Aikido Assocation ("MAA"). Having seen the scale of the event and the organization it takes alot of manpower, resources, dedication and perseverance to reach where they are today. Here I would like to offer my congratulations to Low sensei and MAA for a job well done! From a small association that started 15 years ago it has overcome many obstacles and remain united to reach where it is today. It is my hope that aikido the oragnization responsible will also flourish in my country.

This is my second time participating in the MAA seminar and it was good to meet old friends and made new ones. This year I had the pleasure of travelling with my senpai Chiong and his wife Jeon. We attended the sessions and exhanges noted with each other, trying out the techniques taught and had good discussion about what we learn and to bring back to our country.

I had a great time training with the shihans on the mat, who are always so obliging and willing to share. What the shihans and sensei taught had a common theme running through it, which is the importance of keeping connection. Some are very particular about how the attacks are carried out, while others focused on footwork and yet others teaches you how you prepare your mind to train. There was so much to take in and it was just like in Tanabe. I was in aikido heaven.

One thing I must say though about my experience training with the shihan and senseis. Without question they read a student very well having this wealth of experience in training and teaching. So they know to what extent you can take ukemi from them. But what I feel from each and every one of them is the respect and focus they give to their practice partners. That is something I don't get half of the time. You have some who don't really want to train with you because you are a white belter and some who are also white belters also don't really want to train with you because they want to train with a black belter. We bow to each other in seiza before training but the sincerity is not necessarily there.

Another thing also was what Smibert shihan reminded us: we should strive to do exactly what the sensei taught and/or showed us in class as each sensei has his/her own way of doing it. If you just keep to what you have been doing all along, that is all you have. This is for everyone of us!

There are alot more to share but I will save it for another time. This post is looking as if its going on and on and on...

Happy training!

The seminar venue - Wisma OCM

Representatives from Aikidamashii Dojo, Brunei

From left to right: Chiong, Bernie senpai, Phillip sensei and myself.

From left to right: Chiong, Horii shihan (he rocks!), Sandy from Hong Kong and myself

From left to right: Chiong, Imanul Hakim sensei (always so eager to share) from Indonesia and his wife Shanti sensei with myself.

Chiong and I with Kubota shihan ( an unforgettable session with Chew Boon as his uke)

Smibert shihan (thanks for the reminder) and Chiong

With Sato sensei. He acted as interpreter to Kubota shihan and Tsuboi shihan during their session.

With friends from Hong Kong Sandy and Alan sensei

Jemy from Perth. Very nice to train with and very fast with his hands.

With Chew Boon the most popular uke during the seminar.

Chiong and Chew Boon having a bit of fun.

Problems problems problems

2009-07-07T12:08:00.004+08:00

"…From childhood we are trained to have problems. When we are sent to school, we have to learn how to write, how to read, and all the rest of it. How to write becomes a problem to the child. Please follow this carefully. Mathematics becomes a problem, history becomes a problem, as does chemistry. So the child is educated, from childhood, to live with problems—the problem of God, problem of a dozen things. So our brains are conditioned, trained, educated to live with problems. From childhood we have done this. What happens when a brain is educated in problems? It can never solve problems; it can only create more problems. When a brain that is trained to have problems, and to live with problems, solves one problem, in the very solution of that problem, it creates more problems. From childhood we are trained, educated to live with problems and, therefore, being centred in problems, we can never solve any problem completely. It is only the free brain that is not conditioned to problems that can solve problems. It is one of our constant burdens to have problems all the time. Therefore our brains are never quiet, free to observe, to look. So we are asking: Is it possible not to have a single problem but to face problems? But to understand those problems, and to totally resolve them, the brain must be free."

That Benediction is Where You Are, pp 18-19
Jiddu Krisnamurthi

Going somewhere?

2009-07-01T08:11:00.004+08:00

I was anxiously waiting...

and waiting...

and waiting.

Finally I got the approval today! I get to go to the MAA seminar this weekend!

Yaaayyyyy!

Thank you AI!

Hold on...I need to take some precautions before I fly off. Well let's see, I have taken my flu jab, I am in good condition, taking my tablets etc and...oh I need some masks! (I know that these precautions will not bring to naught my exposure to the H1N1 virus because I am travelling but its better than nothing.)

Guardian pharmacy was out of masks and instead of going to the other branches I picked a pharmacy where I thought people won't think of going to...the one next to Ayamku in town. I went into the pharmacy and lo and behold! They have a whole line of masks for you to choose from! There's the diosposable flimsy one right to the sophisticated ones with an air regulator. I shortlisted 3 but ruled on out because it made me look like a duck hehehe. I know what you are thinking...ini untuk keselamatan apa lagi mau cantik.

Anyway I bought 2 masks.

This is the mask that is recommended by most friends including those working with MOH as it offers more protection. It costs B$4.50

Ahhh...I saw this one which I quite fancy. Its got an air regulator in front! It also looks more reliable.

Turn to the back and there are instructions on how to put them on. This one costs a cool B$15.00.

I just hope that I will be able to avoid the snare of the H1N1 (like, forever!) and have a safe and enjoyable trip. Have a great week ahead and a smashing weekend!

Popping balls!

2009-06-29T11:58:00.005+08:00

I went to hang out with sifu and grandmaster at Saffron one night wanting to have a look at the bar that was newly opened last week. I really like the orange walls and the tiled wallpapers. Nice ambience.

As we sat at the bar deciding what to order for drinks I was recommended to try the "Paris Sunset". Sounds nice and after getting clarification on what the flavours are I decided to order one, not without protesting that there should also be a "Brunei sunset"!

These balls look different from the ones you get when drinking milk tea.

Guess what?

They are different!

These are no ordinary balls...

They are called "popping balls!"

You see, the balls pop in your mouth when you apply pressure and syrup comes out of them! It is a nice sensation when that happens and you would drink like a little child, looking for more balls to pop! The flavour of the syrup in my balls were passion fruit I think...The drink was a little on the sweet side.

Order one now and try it out. It's so good it pops in your mouth!

Exclusively at Saffron.

My second set of finnies

2009-06-28T13:11:00.004+08:00

I was so excited when Ing passed my my Force Fin Pro last night after dinner. When she handed the box to me she took great pains to assure me that the fins are indeed yellow despite the pink fins displayed on the box.

Light these fins are.

I tried them on with the dive socks but I need to pull the strap all the way to the end to secure my foot. I wonder if they may be a bit loose. Anyhow there are always the booties later on hehe.

I probably won't be able to start diving until mid July with the upcoming aikido seminar and work. Can't wait to try these out! If its good for me I might ask C to donate her force fins to me! hahahaha.

Ha Ha Ha!

2009-06-26T19:44:00.003+08:00

I know it is rather belated but it still warrants a post on my blog.

The cancellation of the Hello Kitty concert was one of the best things that happened this year!

Natural born poser- my dah-ling B

2009-06-25T17:12:00.004+08:00

Am I cute or what?

Please don't stare...I shy...

Ok since you like me so much I will smile for the camera

By now you would be completely under my spell...

Resistance is futile...

Love you to bits my cute munchkin!

Aiyo

2009-06-23T08:03:00.004+08:00

Aiyo! My Yamato summer dogi is still in the shop.

Why? Both the computers in the shop are down and have been sent to be re-formatted. It looks as if it will be another week before I get my dogi back which brings it to 3 weeks! I just hope the embroidery can be done in time for me to bring to KL for the seminar next week!

If not I will just have them embroidered after I get back...

Hey guys, miss you!

2009-06-22T01:41:00.006+08:00

The 3 Ms, pride and joy of my aunt S and uncle C

The intelligent and responsible M1

The warm and passionate M2

The adorable and cheerful M3

Happy Father's Day

2009-06-21T10:47:00.005+08:00

To all the fathers out there

AD DVD night

2009-06-19T00:23:00.007+08:00

Finally after a couple of month's the 10th IAF congress & Seminar DVD has arrived! Many thanks to Chiong san for making the online order. He went through quite a bit of problems before finally getting the dvd. Apparently after waiting for some time he wrote to the website selling dvd to inquire the status of the dvd delivery. The reply was that they did not receive payment and he has to make another credit card payment. After issuing threats to report this matter to Hombu and admonishing the vendors for their less than virtuous business practices the dvd arrived a few days later.

I thought that the members would benefit from watching the seminar I suggested that we hold a dvd might for AD members. Actually there was an ulterior motive...and very minor one I might add. Well 3 of us from AD attended the seminar and since sensei and I conscientously attended each session I thought there might some footage of us on the mat. I know, how vain you might say. At least I am honest about it hehehe.

We had a potluck session and Chiong and Jeon took the trouble to getting vegetarian food to cater for my current diet which I am very grateful for. After some small chat and dinner the dvd premiere went underway. I was quite certain that I would not be featured in the dvd because Chiong said he scanned through the dvd and he saw only 2 of us in the dvd. We all who the first person is and when I saw sensei on the dvd I was convicted that I am doomed to the realm of the unknown. I was even accused of not attending the seminar and going shopping by my sensei! His ego was very inflated by then because we could all see him in seiza in the first row during Smibert shihan's session. Apparently the footage of AI was not too clear because he was seated quite far behind. Well I knew that I was there and I have the pictures to prove it!

As we settled down to watch the sessions after exclaiming and pointing out friends and acquaintances on the dvd everyone sat in fixation and admiration of the quality of aikido that is shown by the shihans and their uke.

It was great to refresh myself with what has been taught during that week in Tanabe. To me it was really aikido heaven. There are many things that I would like to say about my life with aikido but I think for now it is best kept to myself. All I can say is that aikido opened a new chapter of my life and made a very impact in my life. I could have started aikido earlier when I was in university but I believe there is a reason why I would only acquaint myself to it only 2 years ago. Since then its been a very interesting and enlightening time. I wouldn't dare say that I will be training aikido forever as I do not know what will happen tomorrow. I can say though is that aikido has become a very big part of my life and I will continue to learn it and come to my own finding as to what it embodies. As long as I able, aikido will always be by my side. I also made many friends, good ones at that too, because of aikido.

Enough said. I reckon there will be a few things that my senpai would like to try on Monday's training as a result of the dvd night. I am looking forward to all of it.

P/S: you can see more pictures of the DVD night here.

My summer Dogi

2009-06-17T00:55:00.005+08:00

My summer dogi has arrived!

This is the first time I have purchased dogi from Yamato and I must say the dogi feels so light to the extent that I did not feel as if I was wearing a dogi. You see my body is accustomed to the thicker and thus heavier dogi so this is an adjustment. But it will be wonderful for our weather though and I wished I have bought 4 instead of 2. Next time then.

I sent it for name embroidery on the left sleeve last week and was hoping to collect it this week, only to find out that the owner is away and have not programmed the design into the laptop before leaving. That means I will have to wait until next week before I can use it. Nevermind, it is not like I have no dogi to wear and I have a seminar to attend. I can't wait to use it!! hu hu.

"And what would you like to drink, sir?"

2009-06-16T00:54:00.005+08:00

I must say I have loss a fair bit of weight since the beginning of this year and I think it was for a variety of reasons. Mourning, vegetarian diet, training and more training etc. Clothes that I bought 10 years ago still fit and I am feeling good about myself, barring certain days when I do not have enough sleep or eat.

I got myself a couple of haircuts too. First I cut off about 4 inches of my hair which took me 6 months to grow. The hairdresser was cutting and cutting and finally she commented "you have ALOT of hair!" hahahaha. The subsequent haircut saw more hair been chopped off and after work today I am going to get yeat another haircut. I like my hairdo nevertheless. It is very manageable and it take a much shorter time to dry. I don't even need to comb it, just slap on some hairwax and ta-dah!

Not many people are agreeable with my current hairdo though. My family members think that I have lost a big chunk of feminity along with the hair that was chopped off. One commented that I look like a boy. Others have said that they prefer me with long hair. Makes me look more ladylike. The list goes on. But I have one notable addition. Please read on.

So it was another night of hard training at the dojo. There were only the 3 of us seniors that night and the effects of lack of sleep, warm temperature and serious training manifested in frequent requests for water break and catching of air. I can't begin to think of the "intensive training" that awaits us in August 2009!

I went for supper after training. The waitress came over and before she could say anything I ordered a bowl of mushroom soup, to which she asked "and what would you like to drink, sir?" The question didn't register at first because I was feeling rather knackered, but after 3 seconds the last word of the waitress' question echoed in my mind.

Inner reaction--->Apa? Sir???
Outward reaction---> Really ah? Do I look like a sir to you?

Obviously the waitress was embarrassed. I don't think she meant any offence at all. Sometimes you get stuck with certain words when you keep using them again and again. Or maybe I DO look like a boy hahaha. But it didn't get to me, honestly. Because it was what it was. The moment has passed and attachment to that moment is pointless.

Amusing though, do you agree with me?

Majlis Bersanding of Chin and H

2009-06-15T07:58:00.006+08:00

The cool couple. Chin looks absolutely gorgeous.

A look of a very happy man!

2009-06-14T15:05:00.010+08:00

"Why do human beings die so miserably, so unhappily, with a disease, old age, senility, the body shrunk, ugly? Why can’t they die naturally and as beautifully as this leaf? What is wrong with us? In spite of all the doctors, medicines and hospitals, operations and all the agony of life, and the pleasures too, we don’t seem able to die with dignity, simplicity, and with a smile… As you teach children mathematics, writing, reading and all the business of acquiring knowledge, they should also be taught the great dignity of death, not as a morbid, unhappy thing that one has to face eventually, but as something of daily life—the daily life of looking at the blue sky and the grasshopper on a leaf"

~Jiddu Krishnamurti~

Chin's malam berpacar

2009-06-13T21:38:00.014+08:00

When I arrived at Chin's place Andre was doing the finishing touches on Chin's hair. There is a debate on whether to put the veil which will cover that nice bun of her's.

After a while the bride decided that she will do without the veil and opted for flowers instead.

And ta-dah!

What a stunner this bride is.

Posing with sis-ta Zana

Cousin Sophy came in and said that he wanted a picture with the bride too!

Evidence of Sophy's attendance someone murmured hehehe.

Bride taking her seat.

Looking all smiles.

I am ready!

Bride's daddy

Don't forget to turn and smile for the cameras!

With Lulu and the stunning bride

Congratulations to R & H on their marriage

2009-06-13T12:20:00.004+08:00

Wishing you both a lifetime of love and happiness together!

Suz's BBQ birthday do

2009-06-12T12:04:00.010+08:00

One happy family!

Birthday girls smashing K.I.S.S cake

The girlies having a good time

Until the monkeys started to eye on our things

The ladies going after going after the mung-key

"Catch me if you can!" They got Lisa's water bottle.

Eljaz and his daddy taking a walk.

"What are you looking at?"

Feeling the heat.

James and Eljaz at the seesaw

Makan Makan

2009-06-10T23:03:00.009+08:00

Time sure flies and in another 2 weeks my vegetarian days will officially end. It is not that I am really looking forward to eating meat but it is just that when I started off on it 100 days seemed like quite a long time. It is not actually. I am sure though that I will need to slowly ease myself back to meat eating again...first of which being LAMB. Maybe I will have a lamb shank at Saffron.

Whatever it is nothing (well almost nothing I think) will deter from enjoying food!

Below are some of the recent photos I took in one of my need-to-take-shots episodes.

My soup noodles with mock duck

Fried dumplings - no go

Vegetarian cold platter. Nice

Peking duck- looks good but no go

Oink chops - no go

Sweet and sour chicken - no go

Minced tofu - as much as I would like to have some, it has meat in it and hence no go

Stir friend peking duck - no go

Belgium waffles with ice cream and hot chocolate - YESSSSSSS