There is a time for everything.

I lost a friend today.

Why? Because there are just so many thing in life that are out of your control.

You try your best to be as true and as patient you can be to you friend. Especially when you are patient, you compromise to avoid matters escalating from bad to worse. However, that could sometimes be misconstrued as a tacit admission of something, usually of wrongdoing. 

One day, that patience reaches a limit. You want to let your friend know you feel, that your feelings have been hurt by your friend's overprotective and inconsiderate actions, as much as they may be well intentioned. But your friend has turned cold towards you, treating you as if you were a mere acquaintance.

Still, you want to salvage the friendship, as someone who cherish the bond of friends. So you walk up to your friend to ask for some time to talk. But you get those few cold words, "there is nothing to talk about, no need to talk" and you are left standing by yourself, wondering what on earth you did to deserve this type of treatment. All this time I had been true and patient. 

It was really a 180 degree about turn from just a week ago. 

And for what? For something that was not even a concern of my friend nor sometime that will affect my friend's quality of life. Perhaps my friend no longer wishes to be associated with me because I am thought to have made a stupid mistake. No matter. I cannot please everyone. Neither should I suffer fools gladly.

Therefore, I made the decision, and lost to lose a friend today.

Some home cooking

Whilst enjoying my life here there are times when I am struck by homesickness. One of the things I miss most is my mother's home cooked food. She has a penchant for fatty pork and I guess it runs in the family. I decided to give the 2-in-1 fatty pork dish a go to ease my homesickness somewhat.

First I simmer the fatty pork in water to make the soup stock. 

Once the pork has softened remove from pot and cut it to bite size pieces.

Put in vegetables to make vegetable soup. Add salt if desired. I found the soup tasty enough without adding the salt.

Cook pork in low heat with salt and garlic until garlic turns crispy. Be careful not to overcook the garlic as it will turn bitter.

 And there you have it.

My mother's 2-in-1 garlic pork with soup.

The little pleasures in life ^_^.

September is here!

       This picture kind of captures my feeling of my first few months in Japan. Alone and lost! Hahahaha.

It is the first day of September! It had been nearly 8 months since I arrived in Japan. slowly but surely I had settled down on my new life here. Today began with an early morning of aikido session followed by another which ended just before noon. I wanted to push myself to take a third class before the rendezvous later at night but I decided to stop at 2 because I seemed to be getting alot more bruises on my calves this week than normal. I did practice some tobi ukemi. I still suck at it and I am sure that has a great bearing on the cause of my bruises for these week *resigned grin*. Moderation is key...

Unexpectedly took an afternoon and after that it is to the station to meet up for dinner and movie! We took a liking to this all you can eat syabu-syabu restaurant because of its reasonable price and the dim sum option. The funny thing is, we always end up at the same table! As usual we were very audible and animated while stuffing ourselves silly. We had ample time and met up with another classmate at the cinema. I wanted to take a group picture of us at the cinema and approached a lady to help us take pictures but she looked frightened, waved her hands and said she is not doing it. Oh well…

Avengers wasn't so bad a movie. There was a build up to the action as the characters went through a teething period before getting their act together. we were greeted with rainfall after the movie and everyone hurried home after bidding a hasty goodbye. 

It was a good day. 

Exercise discretion in matters of importance

It was one of those nights where after the keiko is over, I sat down and tell myself for maybe the hundredth time: you can really tell a person's character when you train with him/her.

Granted, we all have limitations as human beings. Therefore we aspire to continually improve ourselves in whatever we do. There are some who try, improve and grow. Some try, but don't seem to be getting anywhere. Yet some try, but are not really opening their eyes and minds to what is being taught in front of them. In some cases some are contented with where they are and what they are doing, ready to spend the rest of their lives at status quo. 

Given the short time that I am going to be in Japan, I try to attend the classes of as many shihans and shidoins as I can. I want to see how they express themselves through aikido and also to get to know abit more about them through their practice. 

One night I was fortunate to have dinner with some of the teachers and invariably the conversation turned to aikido as one sensei was concerned with how I was doing in my aikido practice so far. One of the things I told him was that it is very different compared to home as back there there were some restrictions with body contact and also the number of partners you can train with. However, after coming to Japan I have so many partners to choose from and there were no problems with body contact. Sensei responded with one sentence; " You have to choose you partner carefully." That statement came back to bite me one day.

One of those nights, I partnered with someone I thought would have somewhat changed after training daily at Hombu Dojo for so many months. My first experience with X was a rather unpleasant one. X was stiff and did X's own aikido contrary to what was taught by the shihan. After 5-6 months, I partnered with X again and it was the same. I am not saying that I am a fabulous aikido practitioner, but at the very least I try my best to do what is being taught by the sensei that is taking the class, not whatever I am comfortable with. I felt that it was  waste of my time because I intended to practice what as taught, not what X thinks how it should be done. In fact sensei came over a few times to train with X but X could not follow because X did not ensure that connection was kept for as long as possible. In the end, sensei stopped, smile and walked away without completing the technique.

It was a less than fun session but I made the choice to train with X and now I know one thing for sure; I will not choose X to train with in future, due to the reasons above.

A little consideration for close proximity

I met a "L" at the dojo tonight. That person does not wash his keiko gi but just suns it outside his house after every training session. There is a strong smell of ammonia which paralyses your sense of smell no matter which corner of the dojo you are at. I had the fortune of training with that person. For some time. Imagine having to practice judo with someone like that! 

There may be a variety of reasons for allowing your keiko gi to descend into that condition, whether justifiable or not. But I think that as a martial arts practitioner and particularly one of close proximity, utmost concern should be given hygiene and cleanliness.

One of the things that our master places utmost emphasis on, is cleanliness. Come in a clean keiko gi. Keep your nails short. Brush your teeth. Take a shower before training. He never used the same keiko gi for more than one session. You might think that some of these things are not achievable due to certain constraints, but some diligence and investment can make it possible.

On diligence; here in Japan, it is the norm to find the ladies taking a shower and brushing their teeth before class. As I have the luxury of living very close to Hombu Dojo, I brush my teeth and take a shower before leaving for Hombu Dojo. I dispense with shower of course during cooler days.  The point is, it makes a big difference when you prepare yourself that way before training. First of all, I view it as a symbolic ablution before entering the realm of the dojo to train. When you enter the dojo you train, you leave your worldly and everyday thoughts behind and concentrate on the training, physically, mentally and spiritually. Secondly, for not rambling on, it is etiquette!

On investment, purchase more than one or 2 sets of keiko gi if you are serious about training regularly. They don't have to be very expensive, state of the art, sweat-sucking-quick-drying keiko gi. Just practical ones will do. They do go a long way, just like how you intend your training life to be. 

I hope that as people get immersed whilst pursuing an activity and in this case aikido, don't only just think  about coming to the dojo and doing the moves. There is more to it then just that.

Hari Raya Greetings

Wishing all my Muslim friends and family Selamat Hari Raya AidilFitri and happy holidays!

In the mood for baking!

I miss baking.

So I went and bought myself an electrical hand mixer.

I baked some chocolate cupcakes and made my first attempt at piping.

I wasn't very pleased with it as it did not look too good.  I was told that the pipe size was too small. Ok. I will get another one and do better.

My housemates tried it and told me they tasted very good. I was very pleased. I enjoy feeding people with things that I make myself. I always put all my heart into the things I cook and bake.

Lastly, I decorated the cupcakes and gave them to some very important people in my life.

I wasn't sure whether they will like it because it did not turn out as well as I wanted. But I did put all my heart into making them.

Fortunately, they told me that the cupcakes were delicious. I have yet to hear from one more but I guess I will find out soon enough.

Iriminage = talk time?

I am sure you have had times when you are feeling down, there are some pick-me-up memories that you would recall to make yourself feel better. They are usually the little things, aren't they? 

The first few months in Japan has had its hard times; I couldn't speak the language, oblivious to the culture and faced strong barriers in inter-personal communication. But there were certain things that happened in the dojo that really made a difference for me. As I stepped into Honbu Dojo for the first time this year, I was intimidated by the atmosphere, the aura of its teachers and the many good and talented aikidoists that train in our midst. 

It was obvious that I am a foreigner. Am I here for on vacation? Schooling? Employed? You get looks from the regulars and after looking at your face the next thing they look at is your name that is embroidered on your left sleeve. I only have my Chinese name written on my keikogi and it is not easy to read the kanji. The senseis know me by my Christian name so I am starting to wonder whether I should embroider my Christian name on my next keikogi purchase. 

Anyhow, I spent one month in the beginners' class to learn the basics before plucking up the courage to move up to the second floor. I felt very inadequate at my level and still feel the same way. In one of my first few beginners' classes, the sensei taking the class went around training with the students. He knew me from our rendezvous back home. I thought it was going to be just taking ukemi before sensei moved on. I remember the technique clearly, it was shomenuchi iriminage. As the friendly teacher that he is, he took the opportunity to welcome me to Japan whilst executing the throw at me. I was shocked but managed to utter a response as I break my fall.

To this day, I still wear a big smile when I remember that scene. The place, the technique, the person and the timing made it all so amusing. Of course, that was not the only incident where things were said or conversation took place over the execution of techniques. Most of them happens during iriminage. But I just feel that sensei has immaculate timing when it comes to talking to me at the dojo. There was another incident which were alot more funny but that will remain unsaid.

I am very thankful for his words, at any time and anywhere. Because of the little things that he did, it gave me that much more to carry on with.

Kagurazaka AwaOdori Festival.

The ALA OwaOdori group with our teacher

I must say, before joining the AwaOdori dance festival I didn't really know much about its history. My intention is to do as much as possible in within my one year stay in Japan pertaining to aikido, languages studies and culture understanding. This would fall into the 3rd group.

Practice started nearly month on Friday and Saturday evenings after school. On the first day of practice I think everyone was unprepared for the amount of physical effort to be put given. In order to get ourselves into the rhythm we were asked for first just bounce ourselves on the spot with our hands behind our backs. After 2 minutes our knees and thighs were calling out for help but I didn't want to stop until we were asked to. After the bouncing practice we then learnt how to step to the beat of the music. Basically you lift your knee and bring it down sideways with your toe landing first. The left leg lands to the heavier drum beat and you repeat the movement over and over again. First we practiced in a stationary position after with we started moving in lines of 3. Sensei was very strict about the formation and reminded us that we have to keep the line straight and SMILE at all times. It is a festival so we should be happy. Or least look happy. Finally in came the arms. You bring you arms up and down without bending your elbow. If your left leg is out, down comes your left arm and vice versa. One round of practice lasts for about 30 minutes so you can imagine how our very first practice was! There were moans of exhaustion behind me after 10 minutes into practice. We were admiring the other dancers whose movements were graceful and much more interesting. But I know that as a beginner, you should be practical about what you can do over a span of 4 weekends.

On that day of the festival, everyone gathered at the school reception and were handed out our yukata and fans. We were also given tags containing flags of our country to be pinned on the yukata. We then took off and gathered at the end of a street where the temple was located with much enthusiasm. I was feeling nervous about not dancing well. Notwithstanding the fact that I am a guest here, I do want to perform my best in the spirit of the festival. We made 3 rounds of dance that lasted 2 hours during which we passed by hundreds of people lined up on both sides of the street who watched and cheered for the dancers. I was perspiring to a point where I was blinking incessantly from the pouring sweat but kept my smile at all times. The festival ended with a fantastic dance number from the group that we practiced with. 

The festival ended at around 21:00hrs and it was followed by refreshments and giving of thanks. I looked for our sensei mama and asked to take a picture with her. She gladly took a picture with all of us and thanked us after for our hard work. As I approached to hug her, she hugged me back and said to me "貴方は上手だった。” I was stunned but flattered that she said that. I replied to her that I wasn't all that good but I am grateful for having a good teacher like her. It really made my night for I felt her sentiment despite our short exchange.

The night was followed by a group dinner and karaoke after. 

I really enjoyed it and hope I have the chance to do it again. 

I need to loosen up

It is one of those days where I am glad I went for keiko. Funny I would say that, you think. After all, the reason why I came to Japan was for aikido training. Of course, my intention is to attend classes everyday to make as much as possible out of my short stay in Japan. However, realistically speaking, execution of such a plan is easier said than done.

First off, there is the injury factor. I got injured twice over a 6 month period. One from over training before my body could adjust to the rigors of daily training. The other was from riding my bicycle. I won't bother explaining…. Then there is the holiday factor, the social factor and the I-don't-feel-like-a-million-dollars-today factor. 

Today was one of those days where I feel worn out and worried that I might not be able to make it through the hour long training. I had a very interesting but also exhausting weekend and it is an experience I d not wish to repeat for the sake of my health and well-being. I slept for most part of Saturday and did not attend any classes. On Sunday I also slept in but went to another dojo for training in the evening. Come Monday I was still feeling tired. In fact, I almost fell asleep in class today. Age is indeed catching up on me.

Anyway back to my story. I decided that I was going to attend class today. With trepidation, I stepped into the mat telling myself to take it slowly and keep going until the end. I trained with a nice lady and a nice gentlemen. I ended up chatting with both. The lady shared her experience on training with me when I told her about my problems with kokyuho. She told me I felt stiff when she threw me. So we went over the technique and she showed me where my problems were. As I thought, it dealt largely with the connection issue. I have problems staying connected with sensei and end up stiff and disconnecting prematurely. After listening to her we tried the exercise again and she said I felt much better than before. I realized that I was only relaxing parts of my body as opposed to keeping my body in a relaxed state. It goes right down to the toes really and I was so happy to learn that today. 

As for the nice gentleman, we chatted about aikido and he was kind enough to try and speak to me in English. He was very good to train with and I had a tough time keeping up with him. 

Well, here I am, at home and extremely tired but very happy. Happy that I went for training and got something important out of it. 

I am looking forward to tomorrow's lesson.