Memories

I was thinking whether to attend a funeral of a colleague's grandfather.

I was afraid that I would break down during the visit.

That would look very strange considering the fact that I do not know my colleague's late grandfather at all.

But he went to my late grandfather's funeral.

I should show the same support. Its only right I said to myself.

I decided to wear my late grandfather's watch.

3 of us went and I was doing well.

We were invited to pay our respects and that's when the dam broke loose.

It was as if I went back time to 8 months ago, when my late grandfather was lying in the casket.

I still cannot believe that you are gone, but at the same time I want to believe that you are at a better place.

Remember the time when you were in the medical plane, all strapped up and ready to go Singapore for what would be your last operation?

We took turns to go into the plane to speak to you.

I held your hand and told you that I love you, that you will get well and it will be fine.

I do love you. I really really really really do.

I love you ngiung...always have, still do and always will.

Have fun in heaven.

A weekend in KK

My mom and I went for an overnight trip to KK to do a few things which I am pleased to inform that all got done. We did not book a room at my mom's usual hotel, Promenade Hotel as a friend of mine that suggested that I try out Myne Hotel located in Warisan Square. Our flight landed at 9:00hrs so I did not get to see the room until 14:00hrs. In between my mom and I went to this place in KK Times square to do a health check and also indulged oursalves in a near 2 hour massage. What a good nap I had!

Upon checking in this is what I got. Pictures below were taken with my SE W508.

The beds were clean and mattreses were not too soft.


Entrance to the room. It has a LCD TV but the reception was not very good. Pictures were grainy on some channels.


Dressing area. There is a DIY safe deposit box.


Shower room with Panasonic water heater. There was a good array of toilettries which I did not expect. What you see on the shower room door is not just a decoration but the metal straps comes out as clothing hooks. Pretty dandy the design is.


View from the entrance. The room is quite small but it is new and clean. For the room I booked it comes with windows but you cannot open them. My only complaint was the air conditioner which gave us alot of problems in terms of the temperature and timer control. My mom hates it when the room is not cold enough and only after 3 trips made by the mechanic the problem was fixed.

The hotel is located in town centre and is in a shopping area so food and shopping is not a problem. There is a promotion going on for the hotel's opening so the superior room was going for RM158.00 nett per night. Somehow my mom and I couldnt quite get used to the food in KK (or maybe its just not prepared properly) the next morning we were stricken with a "lau sai" special for the whole morning. As a result we spent a good part in the room in the morning.

Saturday night I got to meet up with an old friend of mine Zar who's flown in to KK from KL with her colleagues in setting up their counter for the soon to be opened MetroJaya. After many missed opportunities in the year we finally got to meet. As usual time was too short but we managed to have a photgraph taken to commemorate our meeting. She looks really good. Check out the difference in the size of our arms! Hehehehe.

The next day, after breakfast and spending a good part of the morning in the hotel room, we checked out and went to Starbucks to wait for an aikido friend to pick me up for Zainuddin sensei's class (arranged in conjunction with my visit to KK. How nice.). While mama and I were sipping on our drinks and chatting away we noticed this man sitting next to us just outside the cafe. He was acting strangely and the next thing we know he moved to another table further away. I noticed that he was eating a piece of pastry left behind by a previous customer and savouring the leftover. He also went over to abother table asking a customer for a cigarette. He smiled like a child when was given one. I took a picture of him sitting in contemplation as he was taking his smoke.

If one takes the time to see down anywhere and just see the world goes by, you would be in for a store of things. Being a loner it is something that I do quite often in my solo outings. Of course this time I had the opportunity to point this out to mama. But it does make me take stock of my life, and to tell myself to stop comparing myself to others when gauging myself in terms of happiness or success or anything in that matter. We are all born with a reason, a journey to make, a purpose to fulfil and a story to weave. Behind every face there is a story, but let's make our own as abounding as we can.

Living from moment to moment.

The tremendous need for attachment

Our relationship is possessiveness, attachment, various forms of intrusion upon each other.
What is attachment? Why do we have such tremendous need for attachment? What are the implications of attachment? Why is one attached? When you are attached to anything, there is always fear in it, fear of losing it. There is always a sense of insecurity. Please observe it for yourself. There is always a sense of separation. I am attached to my wife. I am attached to her because she gives me pleasure sexually, gives me pleasure as a companion; you know all this without my telling you. So I am attached to her, which means I am jealous, frightened. Where there is jealousy, there is hatred. And is attachment love? That is one point to note in our relationships.

Mind Without Measure, pp 80-81
Jiddu Krishnamurti

An expression

We were strangers you and I
A decade plus 2 years ago
Its from there the process starts
Knowing you and knowing me

3 years passed and I went home
Hoping I could stay behind
But like the rivers to the sea
Our friendship grew and grew

Sometimes we don't talk so much
But we would know what to do
Our silent moments are indeed golden
Knowing you and knowing me

Talk we do of everything
We laughed we cried we embrace in love
Through all the years good or not
Our friendship grew and grew

Made of all things strong and good
You are God's fine piece of work
How I cherish our bond
May it last in eternity.

Departures

I finally got my hands on the dvd for the long awaited movie "Departure". I tend to go for international movies when making selection for in flight movies and this movie caguht my eye. At the time of selection I was not aware of the rave reviews it attracted or the nominations given. I am very much into most things Japanese and is recently addicted to watching "batsu" game shows. to get an idea of what a batsu game is, please read the information here.

I digress.

During the numerous recesses I took in writing this post I originally intended to give a synopsis of the movie but then again after having benefit from the recesses I decided that I wasn't going to spoil it for anyone.

It touched on death, taboo subjects, discrimination and social conditioning with other related topics. It was a quiet movie in a sense that there wasn't a lot of dialogue, but the silence and acting skills deliver a powerful imagery and message.

It also made me cried buckets too.

2 thumbs up for this movie! go grab yourself a dvd now!

Of my tools

It was just another day at work.

There were many files to clear and much drafting to be done. It came to a point where I thought a short break would be in order. So I put my pen down and closed my eyes for about a minute. When I opened my eyes its gaze happen to be upon one the tools of my trade, my trusty pens.

Like all other things, there is a story behind these writing instruments. Eversince I started cursive writing ( I am very grateful to the teachers of At. Andrew's school who made us all learn it when I started Secondary 1 after spending 6 years in Chung Hwa school previously), I grew to be fond of fountain pens. Ink stains on my thumb and middle finger is a near daily occurence and I would never miss the fountain pen counter on our family weekend outings at the departmental store. Actually it was just Yaohan then. Before that it was Klasse. Hehehehe.

In the time of computers and keyboards I remain true to pen and paper. It is just not the same writing with a pen compared to writing using the keyboard. That personal touch is missing.

One thing I love is to receiving and reading letters from friends and family. Those letters are testaments to the love and thoughts as expressed through the movements of their own hands. I don't really know how to put it across articulately but I hope you get the idea. I kept all the letters that I received in a box and time and again I will take them out and read it. When the family was moving house last month I took out the letter that my (then) little brothers wrote to me. It brought back so many memories. I could imagine the look on their adorable faces as they wrote, sealed and posted that letter, with their thoughts of and affection for me.

Ok moving on.

What you saw in my pen case are the 3 most used pens.

This is the first fountain pen that I used and also my favourite. My father gave it to me when I was whining about not having a fountain pen of my own. It has a broad nib and a very smooth feel. You can see the ravages of time on the cap. This is pen is about 3 decades old. I use it mostly for drafting.

This MontBlanc Meisterstruck ballpoint pen is a gift from my uncle after he knew that I has passed my LLB Finals. When he handed this pen to me he told me " Chui, I hope with this pen you would do what you think is good and right." A motto I practice in whatever I do.

This Sheaffer fountain pen is a birthday gift from my senior and colleague. The most recent addition to my fountain pen collection and is currently occupying the last slot in my pen case. It has the initials "SW" which I use at work. It has a medium nib and I generally use it to make amendments and take short notes.

This Lamy fountain pen is for "rough use". It has a medium nib and resides in my office room.

This Pilot G3 has a 1.0 nib which is the broadest thus far. Great for signing letters especially the waxy ones.

Ahhh...this Pilot G2 1.0 pen is my correction pen. I am quite fastidious an tend to make alot of amendments when it is called for and I use this pen to make sure that the secretaries don't miss my amendments. The red ink plus my "unique" penmanship is a source of neverending sufferance for the ladies. I am a leftie after all. He he he.

Last but not least, my Pilot Shaker mechanical pencil. Mostly used when I am updating legislation. It is used together with my correction pen. I started using Shakers when I was 12 and was devastated when I lost my collection of Shakers that I had with me for over 15 years. I bought this from Hua Ho 2 years ago together with a black version of it. I was so so happy that they have Shakers in white.

There you go. My tools. Its use, like many other things, has an impact not only on the person who uses it but also those who made it and those who receives what come out of it. So whenever you express yourself through these wonderful tools, give them a thought as they certain deserve the same.

A treat for my eyes

Between Denzel Washington and John Travolta...its Denzel any day.

Lunch with family

I have been eating out quite often lately due to several reasons but mainly so that I can spend some time with my family. We had lunch at a restaurant near No. 2's workplace and I was also missing the "fried meat" that No. 2 ordered yesterday. Since No. 3 has yet to taste I seized upon the opportunity to order the same dish.

Wet fried noodle with mata lembu as ordered by No.3


Yes the tasty "fried meat" that has left me craving for more!


Mama's sweet and sour pork rice.


My ginger steamed free range chicken. Not very impressed with it. I guess I don't like eating this dish cold.

The quest for chocolate pudding

I read from a website somewhere that there is this place which serves a decent chocolate pudding/fondant/lava cake. Excited, I enlisted my Chin Chin to go try it out. She did not have high hopes for this outing as somehow she feels that she'd be disappointed. We are quite, if not very strigent on the standards for this dessert. That is because (the word "because" to be said with a slight drawl) it is our bonding food. So it has got to be a very good one that is.

We started off with having lamb with gravy for our main course. For the price we were charged I find it acceptable. The mash potatoes were not bad but certain pieces of the lamb were tough to chew.

Then came the dessert. Hmm ice cream is outside instead of on the pudding. Hmmm crust looks too light coloured. Hmmmm. *scrutinizes*

As I took a closer look, the texture of the crust looks like that of a cake which looks to thick to be that of a chocolate fondant.

As suspected. Too thick and gooey. I have read the history of how the chocolate fondant came about but this really looks like an unbaked cake!


I could only finish the crust as I could not stomach the molten chocolate. It was more buttery and chocolatey. *shipai da*


Verdict: I would not order it again.

On one of those acts I find most unpleasant

"…Throughout life, from childhood, from school until we die, we are taught to compare ourselves with another; yet when I compare myself with another I am destroying myself. In a school, in an ordinary school where there are a lot of boys, when one boy is compared with another who is very clever, who is the head of the class, what is actually taking place? You are destroying the boy. That’s what we are doing throughout life. Now, can I live without comparison—without comparison with anybody? This means there is no high, no low—there is not the one who is superior and the other who is inferior. You are actually what you are and to understand what you are, this process of comparison must come to an end. If I am always comparing myself with some saint or some teacher, some businessman, writer, poet, and all the rest, what has happened to me—what have I done? I only compare in order to gain, in order to achieve, in order to become—but when I don’t compare I am beginning to understand what I am. Beginning to understand what I am is far more fascinating, far more interesting; it goes beyond all this stupid comparison."

Jiddu Krishnamurthi
Talks & Dialogues Saanen 1967, p 86